


The Attendant

by Cruciferous_Jex



Category: She-Ra and the Princesses of Power (2018)
Genre: Abuse, Captivity, Dark Comedy, Entrapdak, F/F, F/M, Gallows Humor, Humor, Other, Whump, doubleprime - Freeform, glitra
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-12-04
Updated: 2020-01-26
Packaged: 2021-02-26 05:27:18
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 12
Words: 23,085
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21668185
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cruciferous_Jex/pseuds/Cruciferous_Jex
Summary: Horde Prime, Emperor and consummate host, would never dream of outfitting his royal "guests" with anything less than the perfect servant....
Relationships: Catra & Glimmer (She-Ra), Double Trouble/Horde Prime (She-Ra), Entrapta/Hordak (She-Ra), Hordak & Horde Prime (She-Ra)
Comments: 249
Kudos: 580





	1. The Attendant

Prime grinned at Catra and Glimmer and left, the door to their suite sliding shut behind him.

The were sat on a beautiful white duvet in a luxurious white living room. Curved floor-to-ceiling windows revealed the planet of Etheria floating like a gem in the vastness of space, in an ocean of brand new stars. They stared in horror at a white haired figure that stood just inside the door, trembling with the weight of the stone sculpture he held. The figure did not stare back at them. His green eyes, tearing with effort, were locked on Etheria. 

"Hordak, drop the sculpture and put your clothes back on," Glimmer choked.

He did not respond.

"Attendant-" Catra said.

"ATTENDANT, drop the sculpture put your clothes back on!" 

The statue cracked like a gunshot when it hit the floor. He bent down and picked his tunic up from around his ankles, where he had peeled it off and dropped it at Prime's casual order to disrobe.

"You don't - have to - do...?" Glimmer managed to stammer when Prime gave this order. Catra covered her face with her open hand. Glimmer stared wide-eyed and determinedly out the window.

"There he is," Prime said, smirking, gesturing to Hordak's nude, emaciated body, supported only by two bar-like things plugged into his dorsal ports which acted like an external spine. "See? You have nothing to fear from your new servant, Queen Glimmer, Lady Catra. Such looks of horror when I brought him in!" He gave a great laugh. "No need! Allow me to demonstrate."

With one hand Prime picked up a sculpture from a shelf on the wall, cubist and severe and made of white marble. "Hold this," he said, and handed the statue to Hordak, who took it in both hands. He grunted and buckled with the weight of it. 

"Queen Glimmer," Prime said, "I understand my brother inflicted massive and ultimately pointless destruction on Etheria? He did this with clunky robots and horrid, gaudy weaponry? He was overall an inexcusably rude guest, was he not?"

"Yes, Emperor," Glimmer said, still staring out the window.

"Now look at him," Prime said.

Glimmer did not turn. She shut her eyes tight, swallowed, and lifted her chin.

"Emperor Prime," she said, forcing her voice steady. "In -in my culture it - to be naked is -"

"Do you think I care about your sorry little culture?" Prime hissed. "The culture of a backwater that allowed itself to be conquered by this pathetic, deformed INSULT?" Prime used his foot to push Hordak in the back of the knee, making him stumble and nearly drop the sculpture. "Now turn, Queen Glimmer, and look at this GIFT I am giving you!"

Glimmer turned, her face hard with anger and fear. She took the nude, trembling Hordak in. Her lower lip quivered.

Prime smiled. "As a gesture of my good will, Queen Glimmer, I present to you the gravest threat your planet ever faced. He is now your faithful Attendant, and will answer to such. He's yours to do with as you will. Punish him with impunity! Or, have him make your tea. Up to you." Prime turned to Hordak, now shaking with the weight of the sculpture. "My gift to you, your Highness."

"Thank you, Emperor," Glimmer said, her mouth dry. "I'm honored. "

"Of course you are," Prime said. "I dislike your Lady's clothing. Such horrid burgundy. I'll have a proper gown sent down for her. Should you need anything else your Attendant will see to it. Ladies."

And with that he took his leave.

Hordak struggled with his tunic. His arms had not yet recovered from the strain. 

"He's so skinny," Glimmer whispered.

"Yeah, he's… he's sick," Catra said. He tried and failed to lift the tunic over his head. Catra rose from the couch and took a cautious step towards Hordak.

"Catra-" Glimmer said warningly. 

"Worried for me, Sparkles?"

"You don't know what he might do," she said.

"He can't even put his thing on right, I'll take my chances," she said. 

She helped him pull the white garment over his head. Got his arms through the sleeves. Smoothed it across his shoulders. "There you go," she said. "There you go, Hordak. Sit...sit down or something, okay?"

He did not respond.

"Glimmer, tell him to sit down."

"Attendant, sit down."

Hordak nodded and sat on the floor. 

"No - in a chair. Like a person."

He rose and sat in an armchair across from the couch, placidly facing Glimmer. 

"Okay," Glimmer said.

Catra returned to the couch. 

They stared at him. He stared back. 

"He's got...nothing," Glimmer whispered. 

"Really wish you wouldn't bring that up."

"Fair."

"It's none of our business."

"I already said fair."


	2. Space Hooker

There was a knock at the door. Without being asked Hordak rose to answer it. Wordlessly he accepted a parcel from a clone and shut the door, then just as wordlessly knelt to present it to Catra.

"Is that the gown?" Glimmer asked.

"That was fast," Catra said, taking the parcel. "Um, thank you Hordak. Attendant."

He nodded and rose to his feet, but remained standing next to Catra, waiting for something. Catra gingerly opened the parcel as though it might be a bomb. Inside was a long, slim, immaculately beaded gown in geometric black, white, and grey patterns, shot through with tendrils of Prime's favored acid green. 

"Yeah that definitely looks like Prime," Glimmer said.

Catra made a face as she examined the garment. "It's very...strappy," she said, turning it in her hands. "It's...really confusing...how do I even...literally how does this go on, Glimmer?"

"How am I supposed to know?"

"You're a Princess!"

"So?"

"You're a Princess, your name is Sparkles, you should know how this works."

"My name isn't Sparkles and I have no clue how alien dresses work. You're just gonna have to figure it out."

"Ugh, fine. I'll go change in there," she said, indicating the bedroom. She rose from the couch. To her surprise Hordak gently took her arm and walked with her.

"What the hell?" Catra muttered. "Okay, you wanna walk me over there, you big weirdo? Pretty sure I can manage on my own but okay." Catra paused before the bedroom door. "Okay. I'm here. Thank you."

She went through the bedroom door. Hordak followed her.

"NO," Catra said. "You're not coming in here."

Hordak ignored this and entered the bedroom. Turned and waited for her. 

"I said no!" Catra insisted. "Why are you here? You're not watching me change, you pervert! Get out!"

She pushed him out through the door. He looked confused but did not resist. As soon as she stopped pushing Hordak followed her back into the bedroom.

"Hey! I said no! Sparkles, will you call him please? I don't know why he wants in here so bad."

"Attendant, come sit down," Glimmer said. 

Hordak turned and joined Glimmer on the couch, choosing to sit extremely close to her. He stared at her, awaiting orders. 

"Ugh. Thank you," Catra said. The bedroom door slid shut behind her.

This left Glimmer and Hordak alone. He was so close she could feel his breath. 

"You're making me really nervous right now," Glimmer said.

Hordak tilted his head. Blinked. 

"Could you sit at the other end on the couch and not, like...on me?" Glimmer asked archly.

Hordak seemed to flinch at her tone. He moved to the other end of the couch looking like a scolded dog, a strand of hair hanging in his face. 

Glimmer sighed. "Look, I'm sorry!" she said. "I'm sorry you tried to club me to death and now you're all stupid."

Hordak gave her another look. Innocent. Confused. 

"Yeah, you tried to murder me, remember that? Do you remember trying to murder Etheria? Or my father? Do you remember any of it, Hordak?"

Hordak frowned. His ears drooped. 

"Oh my god, your ears move when you're sad," Glimmer said.

The bedroom door slid open to reveal a flustered Catra, half in and half out of Prime's overly complicated gown, holding fabric to her chest to cover herself.

"Sparkles would you PLEASE fucking help me with this?"

Glimmer rose but Hordak beat her to it.

"I said no!" Catra insisted. 

Unceremoniously Hordak took her by the shoulders, turned her, and started adjusting her into the gown as though he'd been dressing young women all his life. 

"Glimmer tell him to stop!"

"It looks like he knows what he's doing," she replied, smirking at Catra's discomfort. "Let him help you."

Catra flushed bright red and allowed Hordak to stuff her into the gown, navigating her through the maze of straps and layers of thin, gossamer fabric. When he finished he turned her towards a full length mirror and clapped. 

"Don't clap, this can't possibly be right."

"What is it?"

Catra sighed and turned towards Glimmer. The dress was stunning - long, slinky, geometric and covered in tiny crystals. It fit perfectly save one breast, which she covered with her hand. 

Glimmer raised an eyebrow. "What's going on there?" 

"I mean...look," Catra said, removing her hand for a moment. Her left breast was covered only by a single layer of black fabric, so thin as to be basically transparent. She covered herself again.

"That's on purpose," Glimmer said.

"No!" Catra insisted. "He must have done it wrong."

"I don't think he did. It looks...kinda cut that way, Catra."

"No," Catra repeated, this time through grit teeth. "He did it wrong."

"Attendant, is Catra's dress on right?"

Hordak turned towards the mirror and clapped. 

"Shut UP Hordak! I am NOT walking around looking like a … like a space hooker," Catra growled. 

At this Hordak made a strange sound. An odd, involuntary chortling that seemed to confuse him as much as them.

"Are you...laughing?" Glimmer asked.

"Space...hooker," Hordak said, and chortled again.

"Oh you're talking now?" Glimmer asked.

"And THAT'S what you say?"

There was another knock at the door. Hordak answered it. Another clone - or perhaps the same one as before - stood outside.

"Emperor Prime requests your presence at his dinner. Now," the clone said, and bowed.

"Fucking great," Glimmer muttered.

Catra gave a long, defeated sigh.

Glimmer gave her a companionable pat on the shoulder. "Come on, space hooker. Let's get this over with."

Catra threw her hands up. "Fine. Tits out for Prime!"

"Space...hooker," Hordak repeated, chuckling.

"Stop saying that," Catra and Glimmer said in unison.


	3. A You Soup

"Let's see it, let's see it," they heard Prime say as Hordak led then into the dining room. "Ah!" Prime exclaimed upon seeing Catra, his face brightening. "Yes! Stunning! You've killed me on impact!"

"One could only hope," Catra said, smiling graciously. Her hand hovered over her exposed breast. 

"Something needs to be on this wrist," Prime said, gently lifting her hand away with a single talon. Catra's mouth twitched as Prime looked her up and down. "Turn for me," he ordered.

Catra made a face but did as he requested.

Prime smiled. "Is it to your taste, Lady Catra? I designed it myself. Tell me, does it not slap?"

"It slaps hard, Emperor," Catra replied flatly. To be fair, it did.

"Lovely! Queen Glimmer, you simply must dress your Lady in clothes more suited to her. With that shape she could pull off most anything, but in this...ah, she's a masterpiece. Beautiful!" He took Catra's hand and kissed it. "And do not think I've forgotten you, my Queen," Prime said, kissing her hand as well. "Come come! I hope you two are hungry, I've had quite the feast prepared. That stays outside," Prime said, glancing back at Hordak, who looked longingly after the girls, but took an obedient post by the door.

***

Prime led them into the dining room - more of a hall, really, a cavernous and sterile space holding a single huge table. Catra and Glimmer nearly stumbled over a dead clone as they walked in. Glimmer gasped. Her hand shot out and grabbed Catra's.

"Do watch your step," Prime said. "There's a few scattered about."

Catra swallowed. "Do you normally eat with dead clones, Emperor?"

Prime waved this off. "You know how they are."

"I'm afraid I don't, Emperor. Do clones normally drop dead?" Glimmer blurted. "Will my attendant?"

"Your attendant should be so lucky," Prime said, his voice gone dangerously quiet. But he shook it off. Pulled out chairs on either side of his at the head of the table. "Please, sit, ladies. I'm glad you're here. I had the most trying day, and I'm in need of delightful company. Sit, sit."

Catra released Glimmer's hand with a reluctance that surprised her and took a seat on Prime's left, and Glimmer to his right. Prime sat at the head of the table with an overly long, exhausted sigh that indicated he was begging to be asked about his trying day. But neither of them asked. A long few moments went by and he sighed again, longer, louder, and with an edge of impatience. 

"Tell us about your day, Emperor," Catra finally said.

"I'm so glad you asked!" Prime said brightly. "And please, call me Prime. Emperor is so stuffy. Ah, the food's here!" he chirped. Two clones placed bowls of soup before the girls, but nothing for him.

"No soup for you, Prime?" Glimmer asked.

"Oh I'm not in the habit of eating," he said, grinning. "Try it."

Catra and Glimmer glanced nervously at one another. 

"What, um… what kind of soup … is it?" Glimmer asked lightly.

"It's the soup you want," Prime said. 

"Is...is it?" Glimmer asked, looking down at her bowl of grey sludge. 

"Oh yes," Prime said. "It's the best soup you've ever had."

"How do you figure?" Catra asked flatly.

"It's a gene soup," Prime said. "It's a you soup, produced from your own genetic code. Prions removed, of course. We can't have your proteins folding incorrectly, now can we?"

Catra and Glimmer looked blankly at Prime.

"So…cannibalism?" Catra asked.

"What!?" Glimmer asked.

"Autocannibalism," Catra corrected.

"What!?" Glimmer repeated. 

"We're eating bowls of ourselves," Catra said.

"Essentially. It's quite nutritious - excellent for the telomeres- and tailored to taste exquisite to you uniquely. The same recipe - delivered via port, of course - allows my clones to live long and healthy lives."

Catra and Glimmer spared a glance for the dead clones littering the floor.

"That was not due to the soup," Prime said. "Now eat."


	4. Girls All Day

The soup was, as promised, absolutely delicious. It would have been the single best soup they'd ever tasted if not for the knowledge of what it was. 

"See? I told you you'd enjoy it!" Prime said, grinning. "The cognitive dissonance only adds to the experience, or so I'm told. I'd never do anything as vulgar as eat with my mouth." He watched then for moment. "Do you ever think about chewing? What that actually is? And that you do it in public?"

"And how do you eat, Prime?" Catra asked.

"All the nutrients I need are brewed in a vat and ported directly in," he said, showing her a port on his arm. "The same as my brothers."

"Sure, that's way less disgusting," Catra replied 

"I'm so glad you agree! I could fit you with a port if you'd prefer?"

Catra blinked. "I… I'll stick with...uh...good ol' mouth eating, thanks. It's how I was raised."

"Yes, we grew up eating," Glimmer said quickly. "We grew up eating absolutely everything."

"Are you sure? You absorb far more essential nutrients with the port method. And there's no...nasty business on the tail end of the process." Prime shuddered. "You need not fall victim to the brutality nature has inflicted on you, my dears. Just say the word."

"We'll uh...definitely keep that in mind," Glimmer said, stirring her soup. 

"Suit yourselves!" Prime said, leaning back in his chair. "Hardly anyone I ask chooses to go that route. It's a mystery to me, honestly. All I want is to make things better for people. No one understands that."

"I can't imagine why, " Catra said. "It seems obvious this is an intergalactic charity mission."

Prime paused for a moment. Blinked. Then burst out laughing.

"A charity mission! Oh! Oh that's good!' he said, wiping all four of his eyes. "Charity. Oh, imagine. Heh heh. Your Lady has quite the sense of humor, Queen Glimmer. I see why you keep her around."

"Yup, she's a funny one," Glimmer said.

"And she's not entirely wrong!" Prime began, but then suddenly stopped. Turned towards an attendant clone and glared. "Will you tell your brothers to give me a moment's PEACE?" He shouted at it, slamming his hand on the table. The clone flinched and shrunk away. "I. Have. Company!"

Glimmer and Catra stared at him. 

"Excuse my outburst," Prime said, smoothing his hair. "Tell me, have you ever had a pet cat?"

"Other than her?" Glimmer said.

"No no, I mean a full actual cat, not a mongrel like whatever your Lady is. Four legs. They're on almost every mammalian life-bearing planet, if you can believe it. Nature clearly favors that design," he said. "In any case, have you ever had one? Either of you?"

"No," Catra said flatly. "They weird me out."

"My mother did," Glimmer said softly. "She loved cats."

"Ah. Then you will know how annoying they can be when they are hungry. How they scream, nonstop, until they are fed." Prime turned to glare at the attendant clone, who averted his eyes. "My brothers are hungry, my dears. The poor things haven't seen battle in months. It's hard on them, they simply live for it. They've been longing to be allowed down to your planet and raze it to the ground. To kill every living thing. Isn't that right?" he asked the attendant clone, who looked terrified. "Isn't that right, you bloodthirtsy little things? Come here."

The attendant, though clearly afraid, approached Prime without hesitation. The second he was within his reach Prime grabbed him quite brutally by the hair. 

"Please excuse his inexcusable rudeness," Prime said. The clone twitched in his grasp, green eyes wide with terror. "The cheek of him. Honestly."

"He didn't say anything," Glimmer said quickly. 

"Well not to you," Prime said. "You can't hear their every thought, but I can."

"Was he...standing there thinking how he wants to destroy Etheria?" Catra asked.

"Not him specifically," Prime said, narrowing his eyes at the clone. "No, this one is quite peaceful. Never seen battle. Rather likes being an attendant. Liked making your dress, and serving your food. Ah, you do like being near the fascinating pretty girls, don't you?" he asked, shaking him by the hair. The clone made the tiniest of fearful whimpers. " But you must understand, the clones are all the same. All connected. Their thoughts can be transmitted to me, as one, through the clone with the closest physical proximity. I can taste their bloodlust through this one. And at times like this, I must remind them they are being inexcusably rude."

With that a long, scalpel-like blade shot out of an unforeseen slot in Prime's forearm.

"No-" Glimmer protested, but it was too late. Prime put the blade directly into, and across, the clone's throat, spraying blood across the table, into the soup, onto their clothes.

"There is nuance in conquering!" Prime shouted into the dying clone's face. "Artistry! Subtlety! It's not just kill, kill, kill all the time! Tell your brothers to grow the hell up!" Prime glanced towards the table and guests, ruined with blood. "LOOK WHAT YOU MADE ME DO!" He shouted at the now very dead clone. "You've spoiled their meal! And Lady Catra's gown! Imbecile!"

He threw the clone to the floor with a disgusted look. 

"Oh, how they try me. Oh, the chore of rulership! The burden of it!" he moaned. "Queen Glimmer, you understand."

Glimmer was wide-eyed, unable to respond in her shock. 

"Such a trying time, keeping them at bay," Prime said, gesturing to the dead clones littering the floor. "No manners. Ah well. That's what I get for having a standing army," he said, looking for something to wipe his hands on. "Could one of you mass produced morons get me a napkin or shall I use the tablecloth?" he shouted. "And some fresh soup for the ladies? Must I spell everything out for you? Honestly!"

Four cloned immediately presented Prime with napkins and the girls with new, unblooded soup. 

"Speaking of unsubtle morons, how is your attendant performing?" Prime asked.

"Fine!" Glimmer said quickly.

"Perfect!" Catra added.

"Perfectly polite, he's perfect," Glimmer said. "Please don't hurt him."

"Don't hurt him? Whyever not, didn't he destroy a large portion of your planet with a fifty year ground war? I'm surprised you haven't taken him out yourself, little Queen." 

He eyed Glimmer suspiciously.

"It's… he's…he's had excellent manners since you reconditioned him, Prime. The best. Excellent, uh...such excellent servants are difficult to come by."

He shrugged. "Keeping him as a trophy then? Suit yourself. Make of him what you will. Humiliate him, keep him as a pet. Fuck him if you like. He'll make you absolutely squeal," he said. "Or I will, if you prefer."

He grinned creepishly.

"I like girls," Catra said.

"Me too," Glimmer said quickly. "Girls all day."

Catra looked up at Glimmer in surprise. 

"We're super into women," Glimmer continued. "I mean like...boobs, amirite?"

"You are right," Prime said.

"She is so right," Catra said.

"Then we're all in agreement," Prime said, folding his hands on the bloodsoaked table. "Boobs."


	5. Make The Bad Thing Good

"Look, I don't have the temperament for...for whatever the fuck this is, " Glimmer said. She paced back and forth before the couch where Catra sat, hugging her arms around herself, still in her bloody clothes despite Hordak following her about with a folded nightgown, desperately urging her to take it.

He had reacted badly to the blood. He was still at his post outside the dining room door when Prime finally dismissed them, after an hours long grilling about Etheria and the weapon it contained. Hordak straightened on seeing the girls exhausted and covered in blood, his green eyes going wide. He took Glimmer by the shoulders and turned her, looking for the wound. 

"It's okay," Glimmer said tiredly. "It's not my blood."

He glanced conceredly at Catra.

"Not hers either."

He looked back and forth between them. Something flickered in his expression. His brow furrowed slightly. He glanced back inside the dining room as if to hold someone accountable for this offense to his charges, but the dining room was empty. He returned to the girls, placed his hands protectively on their upper backs, and gently urged them back towards their rooms, dead eyeing any clone who passed them in the halls. As soon as they got there he retrieved fresh clothes for them, which Catra opted for, but Glimmer was too much of a nervous wreck to do anything but pace.

Catra lay on the couch, wearing the simple white nightgown Hordak had handed her, sipping tea as she watched Glimmer traverse the living room, Hordak following her with a nightgown. 

"How are you so calm!?" Glimmer snapped at Catra.

"Look Sparkles, nobody just 'has' the temperament for this. Especially not you. You're a Princess, of course you don't understand anything about rulers."

"The fuck this that supposed to mean?"

"That means if you ARE the ruler you never have to learn to work a ruler."

"Oh, because you learned to work Hordak, is that it?"

"Pretty much," Catra said, drinking her tea.

Glimmer glanced at Hordak, who at this point was wide-eyed and limp eared with concern, practically begging her to take the nightgown. She turned to Catra with a look of quiet horror.

"Catra...was...was Hordak like that?"

His ear flicked slightly at the name.

"No," Catra said. "No, Hordak was...I mean he could get angry and violent, but he wasn't like...twisted." She looked at him. "He was actually kind of pathetic. All he cared about was trying to buy his way home."

"By using Etheria as payment? How is that not twisted?"

"I meant in the sense that he never forced me to eat a bowl of myself or walk around with my tit out."

Glimmer frowned. "Well that's...something. I guess." She turned to Hordak and took the nightgown. The relief on his face was palpable. "Why would you ever want to come back here?" she asked him.

Hordak quirked his head at her, not understanding the question.

"I mean...when something is all you know, it's all you know. Even if it's bad," Catra said, looking down into her teacup. "It's like you have to make the bad thing good. You have to make the bad thing good or ...or you'll die, or something."

Glimmer 's brow furrowed. "What are you talking about? There's nothing good to be made from Prime. What did he think he was going to change?"

Catra didn't reply at first. She sighed.

"Sparkles...Glimmer...your mom loved you, right?"

Glimmer seemed taken aback. "Yeah? Of course she did. Everyone's mom loves them."

Catra laughed grimly. 

"What?" 

"Okay first of all, no, not everyone's mom loves them. Some moms are fucked up. Some dads are fucked up. Sometimes parents have their own fucking goals and you aren't one of them. But like… that doesn't matter when you're the kid, you know?"

"I don't."

"Even if they're fucked up you still...love them. And like...you want them to love you. More than anything. More than like...breathing. Even if you don't like them, even if you HATE them, you literally feel like you'll die if they don't love you, like there's a huge…hole...in you...and you'll do anything…." Catra's voice took on a hush. She grimaced. "You'll do anything you think you have to do. For Hordak, that was take over Etheria." She sighed. "At least I think that was what was going on with him."

Glimmer considered this. 

"Is that...is that also what was going on with you?" Glimmer asked softly.

Catra's mouth made a tight line. She gazed into her tea.

"Go get changed, Sparkles. Take a bath or something."  
She turned to Hordak. "Attendant, draw a bath for the queen."

He leapt into action, seemingly overjoyed to be put to work.

"Catra-"

"Look how happy he is," Catra chuckled. "He's drawing the living fuck out of that bath. Go. You'll hurt his feelings."

Glimmer frowned. 

"Go!" Catra said. "I can't watch you freak the fuck out anymore, okay? Go calm your royal nerves."

Glimmer gave an exasperated sigh and followed Hordak.

"Careful he doesn't make you absolutely squeal," Catra called after her.

Glimmer shuddered and made a big show of pretending to vomit. Catra laughed.

"I'm absolutely horking chunks," Glimmer said. "Prime's so gross."

"He's so fucking gross," Catra agreed. 

***

While Glimmer bathed, Hordak joined Catra in the living room and carefully folded their bloodied clothes, then dumped them in what she assumed was some sort of hamper. His brow furrowed as he did this. Mouth made an even straighter line than usual.

"You're… you're pissed off, aren't you?" Catra asked softly as he refilled her tea. "I know that look."

Hordak did not reply. He stood next to the couch with his hands clasped behind his back, servant like, at the ready. 

"Sit down," Catra said. 

He made to sit on the floor.

"On the couch, dipshit," Catra said. "God, we were taking over Etheria together and now you don't even know how to sit on a couch. Remember building all those cool robots? Coming up with all that...stuff? You used to really love being in your lab tinkering with things. You called it your Sanctum." She took a sip of tea. "Fucking nerd. Now look at you. All of that...all of this...for him? For that guy, Hordak? He doesn't love you, he was never gonna love you, and now you're-"

Hordak watched and listened patiently, green eyed, expressionless.

An ache rose up in her.

"Whatever, " she muttered into her teacup. "You made your bed. This was what you wanted, right?" Her breath caught in her throat. Her eyes burned. "Bet you thought winning would be different, huh? You thought Prime would hug you and spin you around? Tell you you're a good boy?"

He tilted his head, watching her as though fascinated. 

"I'm sorry he did this to you, " Catra said. "You were a real piece of shit, but…." 

Hordak took a napkin from the tea tray and handed it to her. 

"What's this for?"

He pointed to her cheek. It was wet.

"Aw. Aw fuck," Catra said, dabbing at her cheek. "I know I'm not crying over you."

He stared at her.

"I wish you'd talk," Catra whispered.

Hordak frowned, and with much effort, said, "Good...boy."

"Yes," Catra said. "Yes, you're a good boy."

And he smiled, as though that were all he needed to hear.

***

After Glimmer's bath Catra had one, then Hordak herded them into the bedroom like a sheepdog. 

"Oh is it bedtime? Is this like, enforced bedtime?" Glimmer asked. "What are you my mom?" 

"I could go for some enforced bedtime, I'm exhausted," Catra said. "One bed. Thanks Prime, you sicko weirdo fuck." She frowned at it. "Though to be fair it's huge."

"Prime sized," Glimmer muttered.

"He wishes," Catra said.

"He clearly does and it scares the shit out of me," Glimmer said. 

There was a knock on the door. The girls froze. Hordak's face flickered with the same anger Catra had seen while he folded their bloody clothes.

"What the hell does he want now?" Catra asked. "It's the middle of the night."

Hordak went to answer the door. Catra and Glimmer remained in the bedroom listening.

"Prime requests the presence of the Queen and her Lady," said a clone.

There was silence for a long moment. Glimmer and Catra exchanged worried looks.

"Sleeping," Hordak finally said, as though it was difficult for him to find the word.

"Prime requests the presence of the Queen and her Lady," the clone repeated.

"Asleep," Hordak said. "Sleeping."

Catra peeked around the door frame. The clone tilted his head, peering at Hordak.

"Prime. Requests the presence. Of the Queen. And her Lady," the clone insisted, slowly, as though Hordak were too stupid to understand him. 

Hordak lifted his chin.

"Sleepy," he said, crossing his arms. "Sleepy girls."

The clone frowned. There was a tense standoff, which ended when Hordak simply took a step back and allowed the door to slide shut between them. 

Catra and Glimmer gave big sighs of relief. Hordak joined them in the bedroom, glancing back at the door as he walked. 

"Thank you, Hordak," Glimmer said. "Good boy." 

He smiled.

"Are you going to get in trouble for that?" Catra asked him.

"Oh no," Glimmer said. "Oh god, do you think-"

"I don't know. I mean I'm pretty sure he just disobeyed a direct order." Catra's eyes widened. "Holy shit, Hordak. How did you-"

She stopped talking when Hordak slowly raised his arms and placed his hands on each of their heads. He looked at them both in turn, as though trying to impart something, but what that was wasn't clear. 

"Sleepy girls," he finally said. "Sleep."

And with that he left the bedroom. 

When they awoke the next morning he was sat in a chair facing the door, standing guard. There had not been another clone messenger knocking in the night. Prime had chosen to leave them alone. 

"Good morning, Hordak," Catra said. 

He did not turn, but he did glance back. His ear gave a slight flick.

"Did you see that?" Glimmer asked. "He's starting to think that's his name."

"It is his name," Catra replied.

"Yeah," Glimmer said. "Yeah he gets to keep his name. Attendant!"

He turned and rose from the chair. 

"Stay seated," she commanded. She walked over to him and paused before him with a royal gravity. He looked up at her with wide eyes, as though she truly was his queen. 

She held her palm vertically before him, touching one shoulder with the side of her hand, then the other.

"I dub thee Hordak," she said. "Rise."


	6. Exquisite

A knock came mid-morning. Hordak herded them into the bedroom before answering it. Catra and Glimmer stood at the door listening, arms crossed, both wearing ridiculously warm and luxurious white robes they'd found in the bedroom's sharp-cornered chrome armoire. 

They heard nothing. After a moment the door slid shut.

"Girls," Hordak called.

They crept back out into the living room. Sitting on the coffee table was a large gift basket filled with odd fruits, fantastical flowers, and many many packages and jars.

"The hell is this?" Catra muttered.

"There's a note," Glimmer said, opening it. "Your Highness," Glimmer read aloud, "Please accept my humblest and most sincere apology for my entirely unintentional rudeness last night. I simply did not realize the hour and would never dream of waking you. Little diurnal creatures such as yourselves must have your hours upon hours upon hours of uninterrupted rest!

I regret that I have a most eventful schedule today and will not be able to see you, but please know the both of you are ever on my mind. 

Please enjoy this basket of delicacies from all over the larger universe! These are only some of my very favorite discoveries that are 1) my favorite, and 2) compatible with your biology. Nothing in this parcel will strip you of skin or induce blindness - in fact I am certain you will enjoy them as much as I do! Isn't it wonderful how we can share things together even when we're regretfully apart. I hope to be in your delightful company very soon. In the meantime, please have a fun and relaxing day!

Thoughts and Prayers,  
Horde Prime

PS: May I suggest you begin with the jellies in the green case? They are exquisite beyond words. I may not be in the habit of eating but for some things I simply must make an exception."

Glimmer folded the note and looked at Catra.

"Wow," Catra said. 

"Hand written," Glimmer remarked, handing the note to Catra.

"Geez."

"Think if I tell him I sleep better in my own bed he'll let us go home?" Glimmer said, going to the window where Etheria floated hundreds of thousands of miles below. 

"You're thinking too small," Catra said, joining Glimmer at the window. "How much sleep do we need to lose to convince him to leave Etheria entirely?"

Glimmer put her hand on the window and sighed. "It's so weird, seeing home this way," she whispered. "It looks so ... small and defenseless. How am I supposed to protect it from here?"

"Are you kidding? Strategically speaking, we couldn't be in a better position to protect Etheria."

"How do you figure?"

Catra shrugged. "We're flanking the threat directly. Our voices are right in his ear. He thinks we're harmless and apparently wants us to like him. All we have to do is play along and wait for our chance to kick him in the nuts."

"I'm not sure he has nuts," Glimmer muttered.

"Whatever he has, we're kicking them," Catra said, "But in the meantime we have to keep it cool. He wants to treat us as guests, we let him. We're polite and gracious. We dig in to his stupid gift basket and fawn all over him next time we see him. Come on."

They turned. Hordak was deconstructing the basket, his eyes narrowed as he examined each flower, fruit, tin and jar. 

"Are you going to be our taster?" Catra asked.

Hordak quirked his head at her.

"Can he eat?" Glimmer asked. "It might hurt his tummy."

"It might hurt his tummy?" Catra asked incredulously. "He's not a puppy."

"What? I don't want him to get sick," Glimmer said. "We need him," she continued at Catra's raised eyebrow. "Also he kind of is. Observe. Hey Hordak!"

He looked up at her.

"Good boy! You're such a good boy! You're the bestest, bestest boy!"

Hordak beamed. He placed a hand to his chest, shut his eyes and dipped his head, as though he were an opera singer being complimented on his excellent performance. 

"Classy," Catra remarked.

"Classy boy! Good boy!"

Hordak gave a big grin.

"You have just the cutest little fangs!"

Hordak's eyes widened in surprise. He pressed the tip of his tongue to a fang as if to test if it really was there, and really was cute. 

"Okay, okay, point taken," Catra said. "Come on, let's eat this stupid shit. What did he say to start with? The jellies in the green case?"

"Oh yes, I hear they're exquisite," Glimmer said, rolling her eyes.

Catra searched the pile for the green case. "What's exquisite about them? Do they have boobs?"

"Maybe they took over the jellyverse with millions of cloned slave jellies."

"Billions, more like," Catra said. She pointed at Hordak. "That's what you are. You're a slave, bro."

"Slave...bro?" Hordak asked.

"Slave, bro!" Catra said. She held up her hand. "Gimme five!"

He blankly regarded her hand.

"Here, like this," Catra said. "Gimme five!" She took his hand and touched his palm to hers. "Pow!"

"Pow," Hordak repeated. 

"Good boy!"

"Found 'em," Glimmer said. She opened the green case to reveal two truffle sized gelatin gems containing what looked like tiny galaxies made of glitter and mica flecks. 

"Wow. They're really pretty," Glimmer said. "We're supposed to eat these?"

"That's what he said," Catra replied, taking one. Glimmer took the other.

Glimmer took a deep breath. "Here goes nothing."

"Cheers," Catra said, touched her jelly to Glimmer's, and popped it in her mouth. "Hmm," she said, chewing. "Doesn't taste like much."

"Yeah. I mean...it's kinda sweet, but I don't see what the big deal is."

"Woo, vaguely flavored gelatin," Catra said. "I'm blown away, Prime."

"He probably tastes things differently than we do."

"Maybe when you don't eat much, something that tastes like nothing tastes like something. Hmm. Well. What else is in here?" Catra reached for one of the odd flowers. "Ooh," she said. "That one's glowing."

"So's this," Glimmer said, examining a jar filled with something purple and swirling and iridescent. She shook it, giggling absently.

"Whoa! This too!" Catra said. "I wonder -" Catra stopped midsentence. Blinked. "So's Hordak."

"What?" Glimmer said. 

"Hordak's glowing."

Glimmer looked up to see Hordak puzzling back back at her, having somehow adopted a soft focus and a definite glow. Tiny rainbows refracted off the green glow of his eyes.

They stared at each other.

"What the fuck?" Glimmer mumbled. She touched her face. Then the table, which she swore rose up into her fingers. "What the FUCK?" she insisted, and started to giggle.

"Oh," Catra said. "Fucking great. Some taster you are!" she said to Hordak. "You let us take drugs!"

"High...five," Hordak said, and held up his palm.


	7. The Most Entrapta Thing In The Room

He had not existed for long, and what little existence he had known was spent in the service of these two girls, his two girls, Queen Glimmer and Lady Catra. Two more perfect beings had never been created, nor two more sacred to him, so he studied them constantly in order that he might be the best boy possible. He wanted to serve then perfectly. He wanted to do a good job. 

Today, doing a good job was proving...a challenge.

"Catra, check me out!" Queen Glimmer said, and took off running across the living room. Before he could stop her she flopped to the ground and slid quickly across the floor, hitting the opposite wall with a great thud. She collapsed into giggles. He followed her and offered her a hand up, which she ignored, opting instead to peer deeply into the polished black slate tiles.

"Whoa," she said. "Catra, there's little fossils in here!"

He spared a glance for Lady Catra. She was on her knees, bent at the waist, hyperventilating, her fist digging into her sternum. 

"I don't like this," Lady Catra said. "Ughhh, I really really don't like this."

Queen Glimmer made her giggling way over to Lady Catra, choosing to roll to her rather than walk. She took her tail and pressed it to her cheek.

"You're gonna be fine, you just need to go with it," Queen Glimmer said.

Lady Catra whipped her tail out of Queen Glimmer's grasp. Her eyes were wide. She was sweating. "What, like you've done this before?" she panted.

"Not this specifically, but something like it," Queen Glimmer said, grinning crookedly as she passed her hand before her face. "In Plumeria there's these huge twelve foot tall flowers that blast out this pollen a few times a year? Makes you trip balls. This is actually really mild in comparison. It's crazy. There's whole festivals about it, with music and bouncy castles. It's super fun."

"There's festivals about this?" Lady Catra replied, holding her stomach. "About wavy floors? And feeling sick? My hands were melting! Didn't you see my hands melting!?"

Hordak straightened. Lady Catra was feeling sick? Her hands were melting? His mind raced. What kind of illness resulted in dissolving extremities? Would it require quarantine? Hordak knelt on the floor next to Catra and gently tugged at her arm so that he might look at her hand.

"Get away from me!!" she hissed, and scratched his face. He gasped and stumbled back, falling on his behind. "This is your fault! You never should have let us eat those!"

"Catra!" Glimmer exclaimed. 

Hordak trembled. His chest ached. He was appalled with himself. She was right. It was his fault. The affliction had befallen Lady Catra was his to prevent! He'd failed her! He'd failed his girl! He would do as she asked, and get away from her. Tears pricking at his eyes, he gave a halting bow and crawled behind the couch, out of her sight.

"Hordak?" Queen Glimmer asked. "Oh my god, I think he's crying."

"Oh my god, poor Hordak, boo fucking hoo fuck him!" Lady Catra cried. "Have you forgotten who that is?"

"That's who he was," Queen Glimmer said firmly. "Now it's like you're picking on a kid. Hordak? Hordak come out."

Unable to resist her request, Hordak hesitantly poked his head out from behind the couch, eyes averted, his hair hanging in his face. 

"Aww," Queen Glimmer said, opening her arms to him. "Come here. Come on. It's ok. She didn't mean it."

"Yes I did."

"No she didn't. She's just a big mean ol' cat. I'm gonna cover her up with this blanket and she'll be all warm and safe and happy-"

"No I won't," Lady Catra said, but accepted the blanket, pulling it over her head. 

Queen Glimmer accepted the sulking Hordak into her arms. He rested his head on her shoulder. She took the corner of Lady Catra's blanket and wiped his tears. Brushed his hair out of his face. That made him happy. Queen Glimmer was so nice. 

"Let me see your face," she said softly, inspecting where Lady Catra had scratched him. "Oh, that looks nasty." Glimmer turned to Lady Catra. "Say you're sorry!"

"I'm not fucking sorry, fuck both of you!" Catra said, throwing the blanket off. She rose off the floor to stomp angrily towards the bedroom, tripped, moaned, and crawled the rest of the way. 

Queen Glimmer watched her go, shrugged, and once more became enamored with the floor. "That is so cool," she said. "All the little fishes and shells. Look!"

He looked. Queen Glimmer was correct. The floor did indeed contain the imprints of billion year old lifeforms, ferns and trilobites and minnows.

"I love this FLOOR!" Queen Glimmer shouted.

An agonized muffled sound came from the bedroom. Lady Catra, screaming into a pillow. 

"Catra, try breathing!" Glimmer sang. "Breath the air in real real big!"

There was a crash. Lady Catra had thrown something. 

"Uh oh," Queen Glimmer said. "We'd better go check that out."

He rose from the floor and helped her up. 

"Thank you," she said, squeezing his hand. "You're a good boy, no matter what she says, okay? Catra!" she called. "We're coming in!"

"FUCK you!" Catra cried. 

"You need to calm the hell down," Queen Glimmer said. "I'm coming in there whether you like it or not."

Hordak peeked around the door frame. A glass candle holder was shattered on the floor and Lady Catra appeared to be losing a fight with the comforter. She looked up at the both of them, hyperventilating.

"Leave him outside!" she said, shaking as tears began to roll down her face. "I hate his fucking eyes."

"Look can you just not be mean for five fucking minutes?" Queen Glimmer asked, stumbling into the bed.

"GET OUT!!" Lady Catra screamed at him. 

He startled, bowed, and backed out of the room. The door slid shut between them. Catra was sobbing loudly, sounding hysterical while Queen Glimmer tried to calm her. He could not make out what they were saying, only a word here and there. He had no idea what to do. He had to - needed - to help Lady Catra, but he'd been barred from the room. So he stood by the door and listened, wringing his hands. He could not make out much, and what he could make out he didn't understand.

He surveyed the living room. Perhaps he should clean? Make tea? What would please them? What would help them? He didn't know. He hated this. Why would Prime suggest his girls ingest something which would cause them to behave in such alarming ways? Why would he send them home from dinner with bloodstained clothes? Try as he might he still hadn't gotten the stains out, even after sitting by the door all night scrubbing.

Catra wailed. His ear flicked. He pressed it to the door 

"My brain won't stop. My brain won't STOP. I fucked everything up," Lady Catra was sobbing. "Everyone left. Everyone always leaves. Adora, Shadow Weaver, Scor - Scorpia. And if they don't leave I - I - l do it myself, I MAKE them. Like what I did to Entrapta-"

Hordak cocked his head.

Entrapta. 

He knew that word.

He didn't know most of the terms Catra had used - had no idea what Adora was, or Scorpia, but Entrapta... he'd heard that before. He had no idea what it meant, but he knew it was a term for something ... beautiful. Something wonderful and lovely. Something desirable. Was something Entrapta what Lady Catra wanted? Would it help? 

He straightened. Yes. He would find the most Entrapta thing in the room and bring it to her. 

He scanned the room and it stood out immediately. The tallest item in the gift basket, a cheerful purple bloom with a bright pink, dusty center. He plucked it from the basket, straightened his uniform, and knocked on the bedroom door.

"Come in," Queen Glimmer said.

"No," Lady Catra protested, but Queen Glimmer waved him in. Lady Catra had her head under a pillow, her claws digging into it. Glimmer had a comforting hand on her back. 

"There there," she said flatly, rolling her eyes - eyes with pupils the size of saucers. "Hi Hordak. What do you have there? A flower? Oohhh. A pretty flower. Look Catra. He brought you something."

He knelt before the bed and presented the flower to Lady Catra. 

"Entrapta," he said, bowing his head.

Lady Catra peeked out from under the pillow.

She looked terrified. 

"Am I tripping balls or did he just say Entrapta?" Lady Catra asked.

"Yes to both."

"Hordak what the fuck," Catra said said. 

"En - Entrapta," he repeated, pushing the flower at her. 

"Why are you saying that?" she whispered. 

"Entrapta," he insisted. It was vitally important she took the flower. It would help. He knew it.

"I'M SORRY!" Catra burst. "I'm sorry for what I did to her! Okay!? She was my friend too! I - ugghhhh fuck, everything's …. wiggling, I can't…." 

She grit her teeth and moaned. He mimed smelling the flower, then held it up for her to smell. She rolled her eyes, pressed the flower to her face, and inhaled deeply and with spite.

"There," she asked. "Are you happy now? I -" she paused. Blinked. Took another deep sniff of the flower, leaving pink pollen on her face. The tension left her body. She shut her eyes.

"Whoa," Queen Glimmer said. "What's going on, you okay? You're really huffing that thing."

"I don't know. It's chilling me out. It's really just...chilling me out."

"Let me try," Queen Glimmer said, taking the flower and inhaling herself. "Ooh. It is kinda...it does do something. It's the pollen in the middle I think. Man, pollen is great! Pollen does all kinds of great things."

Lady Catra grabbed the flower back from Queen Glimmer and inhaled deeply, her distress seemingly alleviated. 

"Entrapta," Hordak confirmed, pleased with himself. 

"You're fucking obsessed," she muttered, her eyes fluttering closed. Glimmer took a strand of her hair, divided it into three, and began to braid it.

"Well yeah, I mean...he was in love."

"What?"

"Hordak was in love with Entrapta."

"Says who?"

"Double Trouble."

Lady Catra gave Queen Glimmer an odd look. "No…? I mean Entrapta was with him all the time but she was just doing tech stuff for him. He did seem to trust her more than anyone, but I mean …although… he was really upset - like upset in a weird way - when she … when I …." Lady Catra paused. Looked at him, her eyes going wide. "Oh my fucking god."

Queen Glimmer made a funny sound. She lay back on the pillows and gurgled, her body gone floppy. "Oh," she said and laughed. "Oh no."

"What?"

"It's, um… it's really starting to kick in now. Whoa. Whoooooa. Oh wow, okay. Hold on to your tits, Catra. It's about to get weird."

***

The girls became mostly nonverbal. Animalistic. But floppy, and silly. They seemed determined to remain in the bed so he entertained them there, bringing them tea they didn't drink, but stared into, fascinated. He put on music for them, something cheery with lots of bells. Queen Glimmer took an interest in his ears. 

"Ears ears ears," she sang, wiggling one up and down in her fingers. "Ears ears ears. You don't have a nose. No nose for you."

He brought them select objects from the basket after he'd thoroughly vetted them. Queen Glimmer rolled a glowing crystal ball along Lady Catra's arm. He found a little case of erotic jade figurines, which he stood at the foot of the bed so Lady Catra could knock them to the floor.

"Wait a second," she said, taking one between her fingers. She rolled on her side to face Queen Glimmer, who waved her hands above her head as though touching something that wasn't there. Lady Catra held the figurine in front of Queen Glimmer's face. 

"Why is it a dick?" Lady Catra asked.

Queen Glimmer took the figurine from Lady Catra, solemn. She studied it.

"It is a dick," she pronounced gravely. "It is...a penis."

They stared at each other for a moment before howling with laughter. 

"Hordak," Lady Catra gasped. "Why - why - why did you give me this?"

"Penis," he said.

The girls went apoplectic, laughing without breathing, ineffectually slapping the bed. There was a sudden bright pink flash through the window, bright enough to distract the girls from their laughter. They sat up, looking through the window at the planet below, which was no longer Etheria, but instead a dry looking reddish world, a planet red like rust and burning. A Horde fleet was in orbit.

"We're - we're somewhere else," Lady Catra said, wiping her eyes. "We went through a portal."

"Never a good idea to open a portal," Queen Glimmer muttered. 

"Nope," Lady Catra agreed. "Where are we?"

"Agretizar Four," he replied, unsure how he knew.

And then, the chaos started. Ships leaving the surface and being shot down - escape pods launching and taken down as well. A surface bombardment - lasers fired from the ships lacerated the planet below. 

"He transported us into the middle of a war," Lady Catra said. "He's completely fucking up that planet."

There was a huge explosion to the right. A moon, previously covered in the lights of civilization, burst apart into pieces.

"Oh my god," Queen Glimmer said. 

Stuff floated past the window. Shrapnel, rocks, parts of ships, parts of bodies. An oblong alien head complete with bloody entrails ricocheted off the glass. They screamed.

Another pink light. The red planet was farther away now, the size of a grapefruit. As they watched, a huge green laser shot out of the bottom of the mothership, hitting the planet dead on. Green electricity crackled across the surface and the planet exploded, taking with it both the planet's escape ships and the Horde fleet in orbit. Queen Glimmer and Lady Catra stared open-mouthed, horrified. 

Another flash and they had returned to Etheria, floating serenely above the stars, unbothered and incredibly vulnerable, seen through a window stained with alien blood. Queen Glimmer held a hand to her mouth, eyes filled with tears. Lady Catra hugged herself. Their previous jovial mood had evaporated entirely. He felt he should do something about that. 

"Penis," he repeated, but they did not laugh


	8. I Gave You Gills

"I do apologize for that bit of unpleasantness yesterday, your Majesty," Prime said. He stood alone where he'd requested to meet them, at the intersection of six sterile white hallways. "It was unfortunate but could not be avoided. Such things are better left behind us, are they not? On to better-"

Prime stopped. Tilted his head at Hordak. Lifted his chin with a single crooked finger. Hordak took a sharp breath and averted his eyes at the contact. 

"Did he misbehave?" Prime asked, indicating the scratch on Hordak's face. 

"No," Glimmer said. "Lady Catra did."

"I see," Prime replied, arching an eyebrow at Catra. "Does she need to be punished?"

Glimmer glanced at Catra. "No, I … no need. I already punished her myself."

"My ass still smarts," Catra confirmed. 

"A spanking? How charming!" Prime smiled approvingly. "You two are just adorable. Walk with me." He turned and strode down the second hall to the right. "This way, this way. I have much to show you."

They followed him down the corridor, then another, until they reached a short hallway with an airlock looming at the end of it, though not one that could have possibly led outside the ship. Upon seeing this airlock Hordak's hands clamped down hard on Catra and Glimmer's shoulders. He stared wide eyed at the doors, trembling, not allowing the girls to approach. 

"You see, I simply-" Prime began, but paused when he saw Hordak impeding their progress. He sighed and rolled his eyes. "Please."

"Why is he so scared?" Catra whispered uneasily. 

"Because he's ridiculous." Prime took a step towards them. Hordak's gripped tightened. He took a deep breath and suddenly thrust the girls behind him, putting himself between them and the Emperor. 

Primes's eyes widened with indignation. Hordak trembled, his ears lowering in fear, but he remained where he stood. They stared one another down. Prime's expression changed slightly. He tilted his head.

"What is it about you?" he muttered quietly, with an edge of fascination. "How deep does your insolence go?" 

"He's trying to protect us," Glimmer said quickly.

"Yes I see that," Prime said. "It's remarkable. Even as an Attendant he's obnoxiously willful."

Prime's arm rose as though to backhand Hordak across the face. 

"No!" Glimmer said, stepping in front of Hordak. "Don't, I - I ordered him to do this!"

"You ordered him to defy his creator?"

"I ordered him to protect us from anything on the ship that's dangerous," she said, thinking quickly. "He - he thinks whatever is in there will hurt us. That's all. He's just following my orders."

"And he does so, even in opposition to me." Prime's mouth twitched, but something in him seemed to settle. "He always was a little too good at his job." He peered at Hordak a moment longer then turned his attention to Glimmer. "In any case, my dear, nothing in that room will hurt you."

"He certainly seems to think so," Catra muttered.

"He has reason to. You do not." He offered Glimmer his arm. "My Queen?"

She took his arm and they made to enter the room, but Prime turned abruptly when Catra tried to follow.

"No," Prime said. "The two of you will wait here. I'd like a word alone with Queen Glimmer." 

Catra and Glimmer exchanged a worried look. 

"Go on," Prime said, "before your servant wets himself."

***

The door slid open to reveal another sterile, empty room, with what looked like shower heads poking out of the walls and ceiling. 

"Shut your eyes," Prime ordered, pressing a button on his forearm. Glimmer did so. There was a spraying sound. She jumped as a wet, sweet smelling mist hit her skin and quickly evaporated. 

"What was that?" she asked, a little too quickly, a little too fearfully. 

"Just a decontamination spray," he said. "Nothing to be afraid of."

"Where - what are you - what did you want to show me, Emperor?"

"Tsk tsk tsk, and ruin the surprise? My Queen, still you doubt me. Have I not yet earned your trust? You command your servant to protect you, as though there's anything here that might endanger you. Quite to the contrary - I should like you to consider this ship as home. Understood?"

He grinned down at her.

"Understood," she said quietly. 

"Good!" he said brightly, offering her his arm. "Come along."

A circular door suddenly materialized out of the opposite wall, opening like an iris. Through this door was an incredibly long room with a walkway in the center. To either side of side of this walkway equipment was set up in stations. Computer monitors, tables, machinery that hummed and pumped. To their direct left was a large tank of water, inside which a greenish, scaled clone furiously treaded water, keeping his head above the surface. He was trying in vain to grab the upper lip of the tank to pull himself out when he saw Prime and stopped, his eyes wide with terror. 

"Now now, stop being so lazy," Prime said gently. He pushed a button on a console next to the tank. Two mechanical cords shot out of the bottom and wrapped themselves around the clone's ankles, pulling him under. The clone struggled desperately, holding his breath, grasping at the glass to find purchase that wasn't there. Prime and Glimmer stood there watching as one minute passed. Two. 

"He's - he's drowning," Glimmer said.

"Needlessly," Prime remarked, sounding bored. He pounded on the glass and pointed to his neck. "I gave you gills. Use them, you idiot!" 

The clone looked merely confused. A thick line of bubbles escaped the clone's mouth. He stopped struggling. His eyes fluttered closed.

"Oh, for crying out-" Prime said. He pressed another button and the cords unwrapped themselves from around the clone's ankles. He floated there motionless. "Ugh, did he die again? I swear-" 

He pressed a switch. An oxygen mask came out of the floor and secured itself to the clone's face, then an electric current surged through the tank, shocking him back to life. He desperately paddled to the surface and tore the mask off, gasping. Prime glanced at Glimmer and shook his head, as though expecting her to be as exasperated at the clone's failure to breathe as he was. 

"So many aquatic planets waiting to be taken - it calls for aquatic soldiers, does it not? I'd like to build a legion of them. Yet this idiot keeps refusing to use his gills. They're there. They work. Yet he refuses."

"I - I don't think he knows how," Glimmer said. 

"He'll have to learn, won't he?" Prime pressed the button again and the cords rose up around the terrified clone's ankles again, dragging him under once more. Prime took Glimmer's arm and led her away from the tank. 

"Are you going to let him back up?" Glimmer asked, glancing back as they moved to the next station. 

"If this one is too stubborn I'll make a new one," Prime said casually. 

They stopped before a clone lying on a table over which was a clear, solid dome. He lay in a shallow puddle of thick yellowish liquid, in which floated slimy organic masses. He was curled in a fetal position, shivering, and absolutely covered in pulsating tumors. 

"Master," the clone gasped. "Master, please - please -"

"Ah, look!" Prime said, directing a Glimmer's attention to a particularly active tumor on the clone's neck. "It's about to rupture!"

Glimmer's mouth curled, her stomach turning. The clone howled in pain as the tumor burst and a black insectoid creature clawed its way out from inside. It immediately began attacking the screaming clone with scalpel-like appendages. 

"This is a virus I engineered out of the reproductive system of a wasp, of all things," Prime said conversationally as Glimmer held her hand to her mouth. "No idea what to use it for."

The clone grabbed the insect with sliced hands and twisted its body apart, yellow guts running down his arms. Glimmer realized the yellowish puddle the clone lay in was accumulated bug guts. 

"How long has he been in there?" Glimmer asked, her throat dry. 

"A while," Prime said, glancing at his talons. "He's getting quite good at killing them."

"Master," the clone gasped, placing his hand on the glass.

"Shh," Prime said to him. 

"Am I -?"

"Yes, yes," Prime said. "You're a good boy."

The clone closed his eyes and nodded, resting his head in the thick yellow puddle. Prime glanced down at Glimmer to see her lower lip quivering as they walked away. 

"You are concerned for him?" Prime asked, tilting her chin up. "What a soft heart you have. A becoming quality in a young woman. But don't spare too many tears for him, my dear. His ordeal will be over soon." He lowered his voice to a whisper. "It won't be long till the creatures within him all mature at once."

"Then what happens?" she managed to ask.

"Why they'll tear him apart, of course," Prime said. "But they'll do it very quickly. And he'll die knowing he was a good boy. That's all they really want."

At the next station was a group of six clones that seemed to share one amorphous, conjoined body. Each one had a book in his hands. The all looked up at Prime as he walked past. 

"Teleporter malfunction!" Prime said cheerily. "I've been trying to detangle them. No such luck as of yet. Hello boys! What are we reading today?"

"Paranormal romance," they all said at once.

"See they came out of it sharing a brain," Prime said giddily, "or I would have disposed of them. I didn't even know the teleporter could do that! And how is the paranormal romance, boys?"

"It's shit," the all said at once 

"Really? I rather liked that one! Have faith; it picks up in the second half."

"They get books?" Glimmer asked.

Prime looked at her oddly. "Of course. They get bored just lying there, wouldn't you? I'm not a monster."

At the next station a clone lay on a table surrounded by surgical robots, his torso open to the world as though he'd been abandoned mid-surgey. He moaned in barely conscious agony.

"And this-" Prime began. Paused. Put a thoughtful finger to his mouth. "I don't actually remember what I was going for here. Couldn't have been that important if I walked away from it. Hmm. May as well free up some space."

He pressed a switch. The table tilted up on one end, pouring the moaning clone into a pit that opened in the floor. 

"Why are you showing me this?" Glimmer finally burst, doing all she could not to sound as hysterical and horrified as she felt. 

"Hm? Oh! Excuse my rudeness, I can't help but check in on my artworks when I'm here. The good bit is in the next chamber. Come come!" 

They quickly traversed the corridor. Glimmer kept her eyes pointed firmly at her feet, trying not to hear the screams and moans and cries of pain. At the very end of the hall she glanced up to see two clones sat on a cushion. They were connected to machines by various sensors and cables which plugged into bloody, open panels in their skulls. They quietly wept into one another's arms. She paused to look at them for a split second.

"Those two?" Prime whispered. "Those two absolutely love one another." He shook his head. "Strangest thing I've ever seen."

***

The went through a pair of double doors at the end of the hall. This deposited them into a finely appointed parlor complete with lush furnishings, the walls covered in paintings. On a velvet settee lay a clone in a long slinky gown, his back to the door. He turned slightly when Glimmer and Prime entered. His ear flicked, the jewelry hanging from it jingling. 

"This is what I wanted to show you, my Queen. To me!" he ordered the clone. 

The clone stood and walked over to Prime and took his arm, his heels clicking on the marble floor. His hair was done in a pleasing curl that hung in his face. A choker with a Horde symbol hung at his throat. And below that was a pair of the largest, firmest, most naturally buoyant breasts Glimmer had ever seen on a living being. 

"Ta-da!" Prime chirped happily. "What do you think?"

Glimmer blinked, looking at the clone. "She's … very beautiful."

"Not a she," Prime corrected. "He's very much male. The clones are clones of me, mind. Were I to make one female it would no longer be a clone of me, would it? That would be a clone of someone else." Prime gave a playful tug of the curl that hung dramatically in the clone's face, making it bounce. The clone smiled shyly, blushing. "But you are correct. He is very beautiful."

"I'm sorry," Glimmer said to the clone.

Prime made a noise of disgust. "My Queen, they are machines. Livestock. You needn't ever apologize to one."

"Oh. I do tend to apologize when I'm in the wrong. Bad habit of mine."

"Geniuine apologies are a terrible habit for a ruler," Prime muttered. "Explains a few things. In any case my dear, I made this prototype for you. An upgrade to your gift, if you like."

"An upgrade?"

"To your servant, of course!" Prime gestured to the clone's heaving chest. "Boobs!"

Glimmer blinked. "You're… you're offering to give Hordak boobs?"

Prime made a face at her use of his name. "Yes, my dear, that's what I'm offering. Your Attendant is meant to satisfy all your needs. I'd be remiss to offer you anything less than the complete package. You see, Queen Glimmer, I can provide for you. For you and your fellow Princesses. What I can do for you no one else in the universe can."

"Me and my fellow Princesses?"

"Why yes! I should very much like the five of you to come live with me, here, on the ship, so we might learn about this weapon together. You'll be provided for in absolute luxury - luxury that befits royalty, not the provincial circumstances you're accustomed to. You'll all live with me, here, as my guests … and perhaps companions, after a time. I should very much like us to all come to know one another. To be as a family, so we might conquer the universe as one. I will keep you in perfect opulence, and in return you will operate the Heart of Etheria at my discretion. And, if you see fit, keep me in good company." Prime sighed, lifting the clone's chin. "You see, as beautifully as I can craft my creations, I'm loathe to admit I'm bored of them. They only say what I program them to say, feel as I order them to feel. It would be a joy for me to have real friends to conquer with. It turns out Emperor of the Known Universe is a heavy crown, one weighed down with boredom, and, well … a certain degree of loneliness." He tilted his head at Glimmer. "You understand."

"I can't say that I do," Glimmer replied archly. "I've always had friends. I've never had to build one in my life."

Prime's eyes narrowed. 

"You dare slight me?" he asked quietly.

Glimmer's heart dropped into her stomach. "No, I - I meant -"

"Let me make something clear to you. I have been exceedingly polite with and generous to you, but do not for an instant entertain the fallacy that we are equals, little queen. Should I so desire I could simply take what I want from you, from Lady Catra, from your whole planet and every person you love that stands upon it. Your very existence is balanced on the tightrope of my kindness."

"I-"

"There cannot be war between us, Queen Glimmer, because no war is possible. There is no fight. Etheria was my new pet the moment she appeared in this dimension. It is your actions which determine whether she is the contented cat upon my lap, or the filthy mongrel chained outside. Do I make myself clear?"

"Yes," Glimmer said, feeling a rage begin to broil within her. She tamped it down. Not here. Not now.

"Good!" Prime said brightly. "Now, I would like for you to contact the other Princesses and inform them of my kind offer. When they have accepted I will send for them so they might make their homes here with me."

Glimmer paused. An idea suddenly germinated fully formed in her mind. She turned away from Prime slightly. Looked at the floor and thought of something heartbreaking. The clone covered in tumors, having known nothing but agony, yet still asking Prime to tell him he was a good boy. 

"I'm - I'm sorry," she whispered to Prime. "I've been terribly unfair to you."

Glimmer's lower lip quivered. A tear rolled down her face. 

He gasped softly. "No," he said, putting his hands on her shoulders.

"I'm so ashamed," she sniffled. "I've been so rude. I'm too young to rule, I was placed on these throne before my time and I don't know anything. You've been so kind to us when you didn't have to be. You took away Etheria's greatest enemy and set him at my feet. Then you offer Etheria the stars and I … I slight you? I'm so sorry, Prime. You didn't deserve that."

And with this Glimmer allowed herself to fully sob. Prime took her in his arms, stroking her hair. "No no no. I was too harsh with the truth. Oh, my poor little flower. Do not weep. You are both smart and wise for coming to this clarity so quickly. A good ruler does what is best for her people. Your youth and inexperience do not discount you in the least."

"Even though apologizing is a bad habit in a ruler?" she asked meekly, sniffling.

"Apologizing to an underling is a bad quality in a ruler," he said, wiping her tears. "I am not your underling."

She gave a soft chuckle. "No, definitely not. Wait!" she said suddenly, looking up at him with wide, innocent eyes. "Let me make it up to you!"

He cocked his head. "Oh?"

"It may take a little time for the other Princesses to come around to my way of seeing things," she said. "In the meantime I'd hate for you to feel bored or lonesome, even for a moment!"

He gave an amused little grin. "And what do you propose?" 

"I'd like you to meet Etheria's greatest entertainer. An actor of planet-wide renown. They're my very favorite."

"You don't say!" Prime replied. "I'm a bit of a thespian myself. And what is this actor's name?"

Glimmer smiled up at Prime. Her plan was going off without a hitch.

"Their name is Double Trouble."


	9. Occupy Horde Prime

"Oh hello ladies!" Double Trouble chirped from where they hung over Hordak's shoulders. Their servant and his lizard captive stood in the airlock, having just arrived from Etheria. Hordak grinned with pride like a hunter with a trophy. "Nice to see you two getting along! Now, hot as it was to be manhandled by your sexy albino goon-"

"Hordak!" Glimmer said. "Oh my god, Hordak put them down!"

Hordak's face fell. 

"Hor -Hordak?" Double Trouble said. "This is Hordak?"

"Yep, that's Hordak," Catra said.

They craned their neck to look up at him. "What happened to him?"

"Horde Prime happened to him. Quite an improvement, don't you think?" Catra replied, looking at her claws. "Hordak, put them down, please."

"Nooo! That was the best part!" Double Trouble whined as Hordak placed them on their feet and undid their handcuffs. "Aw. No fun. I was kinda hoping one of those soldiers patrolling around might have a sexual awakening and drag me back to his spaceship. They're so….mmm!"

Catra and Glimmer glanced at one another. 

"Soldiers patrolling around?" Gimmer asked. "Prime has boots on the ground?"

"Yes, they're everywhere. Not doing much. Just walking around in threes scanning everything and not talking to anyone. You try to talk to them and they're like, no, I'm going to ignore you and stare at this crystal for forty five minutes. Or I'm just gonna walk into someone's house and sit on their couch peering at their family like a ding dong." Double Trouble looked at their talons. "It's infuriating. But Hordak broke the mold!" they cheered, affectionately patting his chest. "Full fireman carry and everything! If you ladies are trying to book me, gotta say, great opener."

"Well he was supposed to be a little more polite about it," Glimmer said. "Unless you refused."

"Oh he was! And I did!" they said, running their newly freed hand through their hair. "He broke into my room in Bright Moon in the middle of the night like a proper romantic villain, showed me your recorded message about needing me and explaining everything when we got there, to which I immediately replied no!" They held their wrist to their forehead. "No! I simply will not go with you! Don't you dare cuff me and toss me over your shoulder like a big horny barbarian!" 

Glimmer and Catra stared blankly up at Double Trouble, who gave a frustrated sigh. 

"It's not a sexy abduction if I just agree to go with him from jump! Sheesh, you two are no fun at all." 

"I take it back," Catra muttered to Glimmer. "This was a great idea."

***

"This is a terrible idea," Catra had said the day before when Glimmer returned from her meeting with Prime. "Double Trouble won't be loyal to us, you know that."

"I don't need them to be loyal to us, I need them to keep Prime busy while we figure out what the hell we're going to do." 

"Okay," Catra said, pacing back and forth. "Then we - we -" she stopped for a moment to peer at Glimmer and Hordak. "Could you tell him to stop doing that please? It's really weirding me out."

They sat on the couch. Hordak had pulled Glimmer into his lap and refused to let go, his arms protectively around her, his chin on top of her head. His eyes were wide and filled with fear. 

"I don't have the heart," Glimmer said. 

"He's been utterly skitzed out since you went in there. He was beating on the airlock door!" Catra said. "Acted like he was never gonna see you again. Had me worried, even."

"I don't blame him. It's okay, big guy. I'm okay." Glimmer said, patting his arm. "Hordak can hug me all he wants."

"Congratulations, you made a brand new sentence."

"Focus on the task at hand please."

Catra narrowed her eyes. "You know I'm not actually your handmaiden, right? Don't order me around."

Glimmer gave an exasperated sigh. "Okay, okay. Sorry."

"Apology accepted. So, Mission: Occupy Horde Prime. Without showing our hand to Double Trouble, who will one hundred percent sell us to him for a fully loaded baked potato."

"Oh my god, that sounds so good."

"I know, fuck, with bacon on it?"

"Ugh."

Hordak unwrapped his arms from Glimmer and made a beeline for the kitchen. They stared after him.

"If he comes out of there with a fully loaded baked potato I will fully lose my shit," Glimmer said.

"I'm going to the bathroom," Catra announced. "And I'm coming out of there with a plan."

***

And she had.

"So I'm a gift for him?" Double Trouble said as they walked back to their suite, sounding intrigued. 

"In a manner of speaking. Only the best for our friend Horde Prime," Glimmer said loudly as they passed a pair of clones. "He likes to be entertained, and who better to entertain the Emperor of the Known Universe than the greatest actor on Etheria?"

Their eyes went wide. "The greatest-?"

"We're so excited about his plan for the planet! We're going to be the jewel of the Empire!" Glimmer enthused. "Prime might be the best thing that ever happened to us."

"So don't fuck this up," Catra warned. 

"Can we circle back to where you called me the greatest actor on Etheria?" Double Trouble asked. "I knew you were pleased with my work, but …." They held their hand to their chest and bowed. "I always did feel unappreciated in my time. Thank you, your highness, from the bottom of my heart. I'm honored. Now, the only thing I can't figure out," they said, turning to Catra, "is what's in this for you?"

"For- for me?" Catra said, taken aback.

"Yes, for you. Last I checked you don't even like Etheria. A few days ago you were trying to destroy it. And her," they said, jerking their thumb at Glimmer.

Catra's face was blank. But then she smiled. 

"You said it yourself, my heart wasn't really in it. And you were right. You were right about … a lot of things," Catra said. "But what's Etheria when Horde Prime is offering me the universe?" She turned and gestured to the window, beyond which lay the vast and sparkling expanse of deep space. "And if that's what he's offering me, I can only imagine what he might offer you."

"Hmm," they said, tapping their chin. "The Emperor of the Known Universe does probably have a lot of money."

"Money? Double Trouble, you're thinking too small," Catra said. " If this guy likes you enough he'll probably give you … I don't know, your own planet or something."

Their eyes widened. "My own... planet?"

"I mean I bet you could get at least a moon out of him."

They paused, considering this. Gave a clicking, vertical blink.

"It's the role of a lifetime with a huge potential payout," Glimmer said. "So what do you say? Are you in?"

***

"Come in, come in!" Horde Prime said as Glimmer and Catra entered the dining room. "What a pleasure to share this beautiful evening with my beautiful girls. I have -" Prime paused, looking at Hordak. "That stays outside, if you please, Your Majesty."

Glimmer turned to Hordak. "Attendant, wait outside the door."

Hordak did not acknowledge Glimmer. He was examining Prime. 

"What are you looking at me for? Listen to your Queen, you idiot!" Prime cried. "Promptly, promptly!"

The corners of Hordak's mouth turned almost imperceptibly upwards. He nodded once to Glimmer, turned, and left the dining room.

"Did you see that?" Prime said. 

Glimmer and Catra exchanged a glance. 

"Did - did I see what?" Glimmer said, taking Prime's arm.

"That cheeky little shit smiled at me!" Prime huffed. "You know, I've half a mind to send him in for a second round of reconditioning. He's glitching. I don't like it. It would set his speech back I'm afraid, but in a few weeks he'll speak normally again."

"Hmmm," Glimmer said as Prime walked her to her seat. "Well, I did give him and Lady Catra a stern talking-to yesterday about being kinder to you. We've been atrocious guests."

Prime laughed and patted her head. "Not at all! Her Majesty has never been anything but a joy. Now I've hosted some truly atrocious guests. I once oversaw the signing of a non-aggression pact with a species of hyper-intelligent slime molds. It took the Attendants weeks to scrape the goop off the floor."

Catra tilted her head. "Were they ... previously aggressive slime molds?"

He closed his eyes and sighed. "Extremely. And virtually indestructible. I simply could not kill them in a way that mattered. But even they were not the worst I've ever had, oh no. There was -"

The dining room doors slid open. Prime turned, annoyed, and was met with the sight of … himself. 

"Sorry I'm late," Double Trouble said, sauntering into the room as a perfect duplicate of Horde Prime. "I do have a universe to run, after all."

Horde Prime's face was a complete blank. 

"Guards," he said. "Dispose of it."

Two clone soldiers dashed across the room, weapons drawn.

"Wait!" Glimmer cried. "That's the actor!"

"What actor? Oh! The actor! THAT'S the actor?" Prime said, ordering the soldiers to a stop with a wave of his hand. "Goodness, Queen Glimmer. I must say, well done. That genuinely threw me. I thought perhaps a clone had lost his mind entirely. I - " he paused, staring at Double Trouble. "Are they a shapeshifter?" 

"I am," they said, and bowed. "Your Imperial Majesty."

Prime tilted his head and smiled. "How charming. Let me see you." Prime circled, looking them up and down. "Impressive portraiture, I must say." He gingerly lifted a lock of their hair. "You've pinned me down to the last detail. Why, this must have required weeks of study!"

"Weeks? Not at all," Double Trouble said. They shifted into Hordak and gave that little hint of a smile Prime remarked on earlier.

Prime gasped.

"That - that was you, smiling at me!" he cried. "Foreshadowing! I love it! My word, you - you were in my presence for all of thirty seconds and you've rendered me to this level?" 

Double Trouble gave a grin that looked unnerving on Hordak's face and shifted back into Prime. 

"There I am again!" Prime chirped. "Ah, stunning!"

"I told you they're the best actor on Etheria," Glimmer said.

"Not just Etheria," Prime mused. "This is without par. To so completely imitate me, my voice, my gait, with mere seconds of exposure? Without physical contact? Tell me, how long can you hold that form? A minute? Five?"

"Forever?" Double Trouble replied smoothly.

"What?" Prime said, his voice slightly hushed. "Forever? Without fatigue? What's your energy source?"

Double Trouble blinked. "F...food?"

"Food!?" He gave a high, surprised laugh. "Food! Imagine. Can you - do you - but surely - are you - cybernetic? Morphogenic silicon matrix with - some kind of - nucleotide ripper-?"

"Hmmm," Double Trouble said, tapping their chin. "Nope."

"It's an optical trick. Holographic?"

"Indeed not," They ruffled Catra's hair and smiled.

Prime blinked. "Are you squishy to the touch?"

They gave an intrigued rise of an eyebrow. "Not at the moment, but the night is young."

Prime laughed. "Give me your hand, my dear," he said. Prime felt it with both of his. "My god. Bone structure. Even the musculature is in place. You're...completely solid. That's…." Prime slowly shook his head, keeping their hand in his. "That's truly remarkable. You're truly - are you certain you're not - are you -? " He paused, marveling. "Show me your true form."

"No."

Glimmer and Catra exchanged a worried glance.

Prime's eyes widened with a delighted indignation. "No?"

"No, your Imperial Highness," Double Trouble said silkily, looking directly into Prime's eyes. Prime bit his lip, his eyes lighting up. They grinned, both waiting for the other to break.

"Show me!" he insisted, laughing, clearly enjoying being denied.

"Not yet!"

"And why not?"

"Because like the way this one feels," they whispered, running a hand through their hair. 

Prime raised an eyebrow.

"Do you?" Prime whispered back. "And how does that one ... feel?"

"Hmmm," Double Trouble said, slowly circling Prime. "Powerful. Elegant. Distinguished. All knowing. Or at the very least," they said, pointing at the auxiliary eyes above and below the main right one, "all seeing. These are lovely," they whispered, causing Prime to lean in. "I adore the asymmetry. Are they functional?"

Prime gave a lopsided grin that bordered on goofy.

"Infrared," he whispered, pointing to the bottom eye, "and ultraviolet," pointing to the top. "And I don't pick up a single tell about you on either. You may as well be me. It's...devastating." He gazed at them, enthralled. He took their hand in both of his. "You're devastating. The most absurdly talented shapeshifter I've yet come across. What are you?"

Double Trouble smiled coyly and looked away, flushing. "I'm-"

"I must study you." 

"Oooh. Sounds fun. My safe word is poppycock."

"Your safe-?" Prime stammered, then laughed. "Ah! Oh, and you're funny too, how delightful. How refreshing." He lifted their chin. "Yes. I must study you."

"And I you. I want to know what these do," they said, touching one of the mechanical cords of his hair, then drifting their fingertips over his chest. "I want to know what every part of you does."

"Do you now?" Prime asked softly, smirking.

"Mmm hmmm. I try to be as accurate as possible with my … portraiture."

They held each other's gaze for a long moment. Then they both smiled. 

"Shall we?" Prime asked, offering his arm.

"Yes, let's." 

And with that they left the dining room, twins arm in arm, out through the door near the back of the room they'd only seen Prime use. This left Catra and Glimmer in the dining room alone. 

They stared at one another.

"That ...could not possibly have gone better," Glimmer said. 

"Let's hope Double Trouble survives. Do we still get food?" Catra asked. She turned to one of the attendants that sporadically lined the walls. "Hey! Can we eat?"


	10. Separation Anxiety

"Glimmer," Mermista moaned. Her fingers left yellow trails of slime on the glass. The glistening tumor on her face pulsed.

Glimmer tried to scream, to break the glass, anything, but her body felt like a pile of soaked sheets. Everything she did was in slow motion. She couldn't move. All she could do was watch. 

"Please," Mermista croaked again, writhing in agony. Her eyes widened with terror as the tumor began to burst open. "Glimmer!" she shrieked. "Glimmer help me!"

Glimmer sat stark upright in bed, sweating, screaming, which in turn set Catra screaming. Hordak leapt up from the floor at the foot of the bed where he'd taken to sleeping, eyes wide, hair a mess. Seeing no actual danger in the room he sat down on the bed next to Glimmer and gave her a reassuring cuddle. She held her hand to her chest, panting.

"You scared the fuck out of me, god!" Catra cried, unhooking her claws from the sheets.

"Nightmare," Hordak said. 

"Yeah, no shit," Catra muttered

Hordak nuzzled Glimmer's head then reached over to the nightstand for her cup of water. 

"What was it this time?" Catra asked.

"I don't want to talk about it," Glimmer moaned. She rubbed her eyes, took the water from Hordak and drank. 

"All better?" he asked, scratching her back. 

"Getting there."

"Another day, another night terror at the ass crack of dawn," Catra muttered, yawning. "Guess we're up."

"Guess so."

Hordak reached back into the nightstand for a brush and began to brush Glimmer's hair. She sighed.

"All better, all better," he sang softly. "Very pretty."

Glimmer chuckled. "Thanks Hordak."

"Oh, we're doing hairbrushing again?" Catra asked. "Me next."

***

Their hair brushed, the girls sat on the couch drinking coffee while Hordak clamored in the kitchen making breakfast. 

"It's been a week since we've seen Double Trouble," Glimmer remarked. "I'm starting to get worried." 

"Sparkles, we talked about this," Catra said.

They had. A week earlier, when Hordak and Double Trouble did not return to the dining room, the girls were served fully loaded baked potatoes in silence. They ate in the cavernous room, which felt eerie and empty without Prime filling it, and Hordak escorted them swiftly back to their suite.

"Should we have - I don't know- warned Double Trouble?" Glimmer said as soon as the door shut behind the three of them. 

"About what? That Prime is a narcissistic psychopath? Nah," Catra gave a dismissive wave of her hand. "They can take care of themselves."

"I can't tell if you're joking or not."

"Honestly same, but now's not the time for a moral quandary. What's done is done. They're smart, if anyone can talk themselves out of a premature autopsy it's them. Besides, he seemed to like them. Like really like them." Catra flopped down on the couch. "They're probably banging it out as we speak."

Glimmer winced. "Ew. Of course he wants to do it with his exact replica."

"Heh. Go fuck yourself, Prime."

"Literally! Literally go fuck yourself!"

Hordak snickered.

Glimmer grinned at him. "Oh is that funny? You laughin'?"

"Go fuck - go - go fuck yourself," Hordak stammered, chuckling as he straightened the living room. "Go fuck fuck yourself. Go! Fuck yourself!" He snorted. "Go fuck - go -"

"He's really taking that on the road," Catra remarked.

"Go fuck yourself," Hordak replied, quite pointedly at Catra.

"Goodness!" Catra balked. "What's up son, you wanna go?"

"Go," Hordak repeated. 

"Yeah, go. I'll beat your ass into a crater my -"

"- fuck yourself."

"Hey!"

"Kids, stop fighting," Glimmer groaned. 

"I'm not fighting, he's fighting!" Catra said. "Tell your boy to watch his mouth."

"Hordak," Glimmer said, "Cuss Catra out."

"Fuck!" Hordak chirped, delighted, pointing a Catra. "Go - fuck - go fuck yourself. Penis. Hooker."

"You heard the man," Glimmer said to a frowning Catra. "Go fuck yourself, penis hooker."

Now, Hordak set stacks of waffles before them.

"Thank you Hordak," Glimmer said. "Good boy."

"Good boy," he whispered to himself, looking pleased. He sat across from them as they ate, eagle eyed, awaiting orders, filling their juice or coffee the second it reached below the midpoint of the glass. 

"I just hope he's not experimenting on Double Trouble or anything," Glimmer said, shuddering. "You didn't see all the sicko shit he was doing in that lab."

"I know, and we can't do anything about it now," Catra said. "We need to get back to planning. We need to -" She stopped short, glancing at Hordak. "Tell him to go in the other room, please."

"Attendant, go in the bedroom, plug your ears, and sing," Glimmer ordered.

Hordak looked crushed. His ears drooped. But he did as he was told. 

"He really hates that," Glimmer said as the door slid shut behind him.

"It's for his own protection," Catra said. 

The fully loaded baked potatoes had startled them. 

"Maybe he told them what we wanted," Glimmer had whispered when Hordak was cleaning the bathroom. "He was right outside the door." 

"Even if he did, even if Prime isn't somehow monitoring us through him - "

"He's not, unless Prime doesn't care that we're calling him a stupid asshole pretty much constantly, and he seems the type to care about that."

"My point being," Catra said firmly, "all Prime has to do is read Hordak's mind once and we're fucked. All our plans are fucked. He can't overhear us discussing anything of importance, Glimmer. And that's final."

"And that's final? Sorry, are you giving me orders now?"

"Look, I know you love your new puppy, but he needs to go in the crate sometimes."

And so began this new tradition of Glimmer banishing Hordak to the next room at a moment's notice, which he always seemed to take as a punishment. He would sing as ordered, at first sad songs, then loud ones, gradually becoming passive aggressively loud, sometimes accompanied by what sounded like half-hearted kicks to the door. When Glimmer finally relented and freed him from exile he became extra attentive, stumbling over himself to get things right, to anticipate their every need as though petrified of being sent away again. 

He was still at the sadness stage of singing as Glimmer and Catra planned. 

Or tried to.

They found their options painfully limited. A few days earlier, their first impulse was to order Hordak to take them down to the surface in a shuttle, to warn the Princesses in person, but all Hordak did was shake his head. Apparently their leaving the ship was expressly forbidden by Prime. Prime had provided a communication channel to them through which they'd finally managed to contact Bow's data pad - after hours of searching, and by that they meant guessing - his frequency. But their options there, too, were limited.

"Glimmer? Glimmer!" Bow cried, his face perfectly projected on the glassy wall before them. "Glimmer are you okay? Where are you? We - is - is that -"

"CATRA!?" Adora shouted, suddenly appearing in frame. 

"Hey Adora," Catra said, looking at her claws.

"What - what - what is going on? Glimmer, are you okay?" Adora said.

"I'm fine, I'm -"

"I'm fine too, thanks for asking," Catra said. "You're wearing your hair down now?"

"Yeah, and it looks good," Adora snapped. 

"Not hard, looked dumb as hell before."

"Where are you?" Bow burst.

"We're on Prime's ship, everything is fine, and this channel is heavily monitored," Glimmer said. This was not conjecture on their part. Hordak had told them as much - saying "Prime can see" as he pointed to the empty wall display. 

So, they all stared at each other.

"Heavily monitored, got it," Adora said after a very long pause. "Cool, so … anything we can … do for you?"

"Yeah, actually. I need to talk to Mermista, Pefuma, Scorpia, and Frosta. But I understand how hard it is to get them in a room together."

Bow frowned. "What?"

"I mean it can take them FOREVER to be in one place at the same time," Catra said. 

Adora narrowed her eyes at Catra. "You don't even know them."

"No, no Catra's right," Glimmer said quickly, widening her eyes pointedly at Adora. "It seriously takes ages and ages to get them in a room together. And to get them to agree to anything? Ages longer. You'll have to really DRAW IT OUT." 

"Ohhhh. Riiiight. Ages!" Adora said. She gave a great big wink. Catra's head fell into her hands.

"That's totally true, they're the worst," Bow said, nodding.

"The WORST!" Adora repeated. "So uh … what did you need to talk to them about?"

"Prime is going to make them an offer that they can't - like physically will not be able - to refuse," Catra said.

"Uh huh. Sounds...awesome," Adora said. She glanced back and forth between Catra and Glimmer. "So are you guys, like - friends now, or...?"

"Lady Catra is my handmaiden, we've always been friends," Glimmer said quickly. "Isn't that right, Catra?"

"One hundred percent!" Catra said. "I sure do love my Queen. I love her dumb voice and her stupid hair and how she snores like a dying seal."

"Love Catra, always so sweet, never wanna smack her in the mouth," Glimmer said pleasantly. 

"Behind you!!" Adora shrieked. 

Catra and Glimmer turned. Hordak had stepped into view behind them. 

"Oh that's just Hordak," Catra said, and immediately started laughing.

"That's Hordak?" Adora asked.

"Yeah he's - he's - he's our servant now," Catra said between fits of laughter.

"Prime did something to him," Glimmer said. "He's forgotten-"

"He - he - he really likes combing Glimmer's hair," Catra said, her eyes watering. "And he - he - he cries about everything."

"He…cries?" Adora asked. 

"About everything. Oh and he's got…." Catra began to dissemble, gasping, her eyes watering, "separation anxiety."

"Catra what are you talking about?"

Catra went into full meltdown and fell on her side, heaving with laughter.

"Okay, since Catra went byebye, allow me to explain," Glimmer said. "Prime reprogrammed Hordak somehow, made him forget everything about Etheria, and made him our personal servant. He has to do whatever I say now."

"Whatever she says!" Catra shrieked. "Wanna hear him sing?" she asked Adora. 

"He has a beautiful voice!" Glimmer said.

"Glimmer thinks he's a puppy."

"I don't think he's a puppy, I just don't see the point in being mean to him!"

Adora and Bow stared, blinking.

"Hordak," Catra said, tapping Glimmer's cheek. "Give Glimmer a kiss."

"Catra, honestly-" Glimmer began, but could not continue before Hordak quite happily bent down and pecked her on the cheek. Glimmer gave a resigned sigh. 

"Isn't that sweet!" Catra cried. "What a big sweetie!" 

There was a long pause. Adora and Bow stared.

"You're sure that's Hordak?" Adora asked flatly. 

Glimmer nodded.

"He...he seems ... happier…?" Bow asked.

"Oh, pffff, yeah, he's having a blast," Catra said, dissolving into laughter once more. 

"Adora…" Glimmer said slowly. "Where's your bracelet?"

"It's… it's gone," Adora replied, hushed.

"It's GONE?" Glimmer asked. "The bracelet your, uh, auntie gave you is gone?"

"It … broke."

"It BROKE!? How the fuck -?" Glimmer's jaw dropped. " Adora, oh my god. What… what are we - you - what are you going to do?"

"I don't know. I don't want to talk about it right now, it, uh…makes me sad," Adora said. "What did Prime want to offer the Princesses?"

"He wants them to come live here on there ship with him, so we can all learn about The Heart Of Etheria together."

Adora and Bow's eyes widened with dread.

"Oh," Bow said. " That's …. nice of him?"

"Yeah he's a really NICE person," Catra said. "Completely sane."

"Right," Adora said. "Don't see why they'd say no to that."

"Except they, you know, can't ever agree about anything," Glimmer said quickly. "And they live like a million miles apart and never talk."

"Right. Except that."

"Yeah."

"Yeah. Glimmer, there's soldiers everywhere and people are, um...kinda worried," Adora said. "Should they be?"

"Prime hasn't really said anything about that. I suggest we treat them with, um...kindness."

"Like, kindness?" Adora said, "or like...KINDNESS?"

"Be polite," Glimmer said quickly.

"Okay."

They stared at one another. So much more needed to be said and could not be.

"Anyway, we should probably go. Work on getting the Princesses to talk," Glimmer said. "Miss you guys."

Catra rolled her eyes. "Uwu, miss you. Blow Adora a kiss, Hordak."

Hordak smiled, kissed his palm, and blew it at a clearly horrified Adora. 

"Um. Thanks Hordak. Talk to you later Glimmer?" 

"Yeah, we'll be in touch," Glimmer said, feeling tears prick at her eyes.

"Okay. Bye," Adora whispered, leaning forward to shut off the pad.

"Tell Shadow Weaver she can suck my ass!" Catra shouted before the feed cut off. 

That had been days ago, and for all their banishing of Hordak, they'd not made much progress since. 

Suddenly the suite's main door locked itself. The lights shut off, replaced with a dim red backup. An alarm sounded 

"Ugh. Again?" Catra said.

Hordak came barreling through the bedroom door. 

"Intruder," Hordak said.

"We know, Hordak, we know. That alarm has been going off throughout the ship for two days now. I'm betting one of Prime's fucked up experiments escaped." Glimmer sighed. "I hope one did, anyway."

At that very moment came three loud, distinct, heavy knocks on the door.


	11. Unstoppable Sexual Beast

Hordak answered the door to reveal a line of clones, each holding a huge flower arrangement. They bustled into the room, placing a vase on every available surface, sixteen in total, all of it made menacing by the dim red light and blaring alarm. A final clone handed Hordak a large, slim box. They stared intensely into one another's eyes for a long moment. After another moment they bowed to one another and the door slid shut. The alarm shut off and the lights came back on. Glimmer and Catra stared at their newly adorned living quarters, now absolutely coated in flowers.

"Oh god," Glimmer muttered. "What now?"

"It appears Horde Prime is back on his bullshit," Catra said.

"Dress," Hordak said to Glimmer. "Prime requests you."

***

The box contained a sparkling white gown with acidic green and - to Glimmer's surprise - pink and purple accents, an unexpected nod to her preferred colors. It fit her perfectly and flattered her utterly. She turned in the mirror.

"It's so pretty," Glimmer said to Catra, who sat on the couch eating a croissant, nonplussed. "I hate how pretty this is."

Hordak reached into the box to reveal a necklace, which he put around Glimmer's neck. Set in a net of grey blue metal was a heavy, smooth pink gem. It felt warm and swirled with orange lights she instinctively knew were alive, as though it were filled with the ghosts of a thousand butterflies. 

"Wow," she whispered, touching it.

Hordak clapped delightedly in the mirror. "Very pretty, very pretty."

"Did that clone say what Prime wants?" Catra asked.

Hordak shook his head. 

"Did he say what that alarm is about?"

"Ah...cryptid," Hordak replied, fiddling with Glimmer's hair. "Escaped. From … from the … creature storage."

"Creature storage?" 

Hordak frowned with effort, searching for the word. "Bestiary."

"That's reassuring," Catra said. "All this tech and clones and they still can't track it down?"

"It's a - it's a - it's a -" Hordak said, struggling with his lack of vocabulary. He gave a frustrated sigh and shook his head. "It's - a spider."

"A spider?" Catra asked. "Like one spider?"

Hordak nodded. "I will protect you." He put his hands on Glimmer's shoulders and turned her towards the door. "Prime now."

Glimmer took a deep breath and nodded.

"Good luck," Catra said. "I hope he doesn't murder anyone in front of you this time."

"Fingers crossed."

The door opened, but the way was blocked by a clone. He bowed to Glimmer and offered her his arm.

"No," Hordak said to him.

"I was told to escort the Queen, Attendant," the clone sneered at Hordak. He took hold of Glimmer's arm and pulled her forcefully to his side.

"Ow!" Glimmer yelped. "Hey!"

"Royalty!" Hordak scolded. He tore the clone's grasp from her arm and shoved him with both hands, sending him stumbling back. The clone growled and shoved Hordak, who answered in kind immediately. 

"Fuck yes, clone fight!" Catra cheered.

"Stop it!" Glimmer cried, leaping between them. "Stop it, both of you!"

The other clone backed off. Straightened his uniform and fixed Hordak in a glare. "This is why Horde Prime does not wish to see you!"

"Go fuck fuck yourself," Hordak growled. 

The clone gasped, his eyes going wide. "Language, brother!"

Glimmer placed a steadying hand on Hordak's chest. "Hordak, I'll go with him. It'll be fine."

"But - Queen -" 

"No buts! Stay here with Catra and be a good boy."

Hordak's ears lowered. He grumbled. The other clone offered Glimmer his arm once more, glaring at Hordak as they walked away. Hordak glared back, puffing his chest.

"You win some you lose some," Catra said, patting his shoulder. "Come back inside."

Once the other clone was out of sight Hordak deflated. He hung his head and slumped his way over to the couch. He flopped down onto it, bereft.

"Oh my God, you're so fucking overdramatic," Catra said. She gestured to the flowers. "Prime wouldn't have sent flowers and given her a dress she looks like a miracle in if he was just going to kill her, right? I mean… he wouldn't do that. Would he?"

Hordak frowned. 

She crossed her arms. "I was afraid you'd say that. Look, we …. it'll be okay. She'll be okay. Okay?"

Hordak looked unconvinced. 

"I can't handle you being upset right now. Wanna make me some tea?" Catra said, sitting on the couch. "You'll feel better."

He shut his eyes and nodded. 

"Okay. Attendant, make me some tea."

Hordak sighed in relief. He rose to his feet and straightened his uniform. As he passed her he placed his hand on her head.

"Catra," he said warmly.

"After that you should probably refold everything in the suite that's folded," Catra called after him, hiding a smile. "Wednesday's refold day."

***

After several minutes in a rapidly ascending elevator the clone deposited Glimmer before a door, hit a button to the side of it, and bowed. The door slid open, and Glimmer stepped from a cool, sterile hallway into the most glorious garden she'd ever seen outside Plumeria, overgrown and lush with vines. Water trickled down rock walls into clear pools, each tree and bush heavy with exotic blooms and strange fruits and singing birds. Fireflies lazed idly the air, which was warm and humid, thick with the scent of flowers. All of it sat beneath a huge glass dome displaying interstellar space. Glimmer realized they must have been at the very uppermost top of the entire ship. 

There was a clone to her left who instructed her to remove her shoes. He placed a string of glowing pink flowers around her neck and tucked a ferocious - looking green orchid behind her ear.

"Um. Thank you," Glimmer said.

The clone indicated a path down which she was to walk and bowed. She crept along the bioluminescent stones, her chest tight, not stopping to gawk at the increasingly bizarre alien trees and blossoms and mushrooms, all of it tended to by clone gardeners in blue gray overalls that bowed to her as she passed. She finally came to a clearing where the light from Etheria's brightest moon had been focused into a gentle warm beam. It shone down onto two giant trees with bark like a watercolor painting. A huge flat cushion heavy with pillows floated gently between them. Upon it lounged Horde Prime, peacefully sleeping. In the crook of his arm lay sleek green Double Trouble, their arms folded on his chest, head down, utterly content.

Double Trouble's eyes opened. They saw Glimmer and smiled, their tail flopping lazily.

"Darling," they whispered to Prime, gently touching his chin. 

"Mmm?" he grunted.

"Queen Glimmer has arrived," they said, tracing a line around his jaw. 

"Mmm!" Prime's eyes fluttered open. He saw her and smiled. "Ah, so she has. I -"

He stopped to yawn. But it was not a normal yawn. His cheeks disconnected, hinging open at the jaws. His mouth opened and distended too far, like a snake's, revealing mandibles full of sharp green fangs. His eyes opened wide and rolled halfway up into his skull for the moment the yawn lasted. He held his hand before a maw which dwarfed it, the picture of propriety. 

"Whoa," Glimmer blurted before she could stop herself.

Double Trouble laughed. "Oh yes, the Emperor has a very big mouth," they purred, drawing their finger along his lips. 

Prime grinned at Double Trouble, his face having folded back together into its normal state. "Big enough to fit you inside it," he purred back.

"Entirely," they whispered.

He snapped his teeth at their finger. Double Trouble pulled their finger back and grinned, biting their lip. They gazed into one another's eyes. Prime stroked their face and tucked a lock of yellow hair behind their ear. "Queen Glimmer," he said without looking at her. "How goes your negotiations with the princesses? A report, if you please."

"It's, um … slow progress. "

"But there is progress?"

"Definitely."

"Good," he said, twisting a lock of Double Trouble's hair around his finger. "That's business done. Come. Sit with us," he said, patting the space on the cushion next to him. Glimmer swallowed and did as he asked, sitting as close to the edge as possible. She saw that Prime was dressed informally, in a blousy white shirt open to expose his gray blue chest. Tight gray pants. Double Trouble wore a delicate bejeweled circlet over their intricately braided hair, and a backless white gown made of something shimmering and insubstantial, as though woven together by crystalline spiders. Their fingers were bedecked with delicate jeweled rings, their ears full of stones. An armband with a warm, living gem similar to the one Glimmer wore was wound around their tricep. They drew a lazy circle on Prime's chest and smiled up at Glimmer. 

"What do you think of my sanctuary?" Prime asked her, gesturing to the garden. "Not many get to see it."

"It's beautiful," Glimmer admitted. "Thank you for the necklace and the dress."

"It looks stunning on her," Double Trouble said to Prime. "You have such an eye."

"And the flowers," Glimmer added. "Were they grown here?"

"Every last one," Prime replied. "But the dresses and jewels and flowers are mere trifles. The very least I can do. I brought you here to thank you for introducing me to Double Trouble, little queen. I am very, very pleased with them."

He pressed his cheek to the top of Double Trouble's head. They smiled with a smugness so thick a spoon would have stood up in it.

"I'm so glad to hear that," Glimmer said. "I see they showed you their true form after all."

"Hm? Oh yes!" Prime said. He tilted Double Trouble's chin up with one armored talon. "It took some work. Stubborn little thing." He pecked them on the lips. They smiled adoringly.

"Truth is I found your form so pleasing I just didn't want to leave it," they replied, sliding their hand along his side beneath his shirt.

"As do I, but I've seen myself. I see myself everywhere," Prime said happily, gesturing to a pair of clone gardeners who ambled by. "I wanted to see Double Trouble! Imagine my delight, after all that spectacle of shapeshifting, I found they were an enchanting little amphibian I could not help but…" he sighed, "immediately adore."

Double Trouble giggled and covered their face with their hand.

"No no, don't hide away!" Prime said, moving their wrist. "Ah, look at their little face. The way they blink. Beautiful." He grinned. "Queen Glimmer, did you know that when Double Trouble sleeps, they curl up in a little circle with their feet on their tail?"

"No, I didn't know that."

"It's perfection," he said, running his fingers through their hair. "I underestimated you, little queen. You've shown me you truly understand me."

"I .. I have?"

"Of course! Glimmer, please! I've been given planets, entire solar systems, armies and ships, pets and concubines beyond imagining, but this?" He kissed Double Trouble's forehead. "Faced with the question of what to get the man who has everything, you rose to the challenge … legendarily. I could not be happier. And I am in your debt."

"Oh," Glimmer said, "I mean...it was nothing really."

"Nonsense, it was everything!" Prime cried. "Now please, you must allow me the honor of returning the favor. Tell me, is there anything I - anything we - can do for you?" Prime said, his hand casually falling on Glimmer's knee. "Anything at all?"

Glimmer looked down at his hand, then at their faces. Both Prime and Double Trouble looked at her with a predatory gleam. Glimmer tried to keep her face impassive but felt herself flush.

"I … um … thank you. You don't need to do anything. Seeing how happy you two are is all the repayment I need."

Prime chuckled. "But I'm quite serious. Anything you desire." He gave her knee a squeeze. "Why not relax here with us," he whispered, glancing at the empty space to the other side of him, "and consider it?"

Glimmer met DoubleTrouble's eyes. Something registered in their face. They gave an almost imperceptible nod.

"Darling," they said quickly. They traced a longing talon down Prime's arm to his hand and gently lifted it from Glimmer's knee. "I know my Queen is fond of jewelry. She might like something like this," they said, indicating his armored finger. 

Prime frowned. "Utilitarian? No stones?" he said. "I can do far better than that. I'll -" he paused. Blinked. Propped himself up on his elbow to look up over his shoulder at a uniformed clone who'd appeared beside the cushion. 

"What!?" Prime snapped. There was a pause as he read the clone's mind. He rolled his eyes. "The Alterian Empresident," he grumbled to Double Trouble. "Again."

Double Trouble made a face. "Ugh."

"One thing after another with him," Prime said. "If Alteria weren't the only source of diontanium in the universe I'd smite it the fabric of spacetime. What kind of people voluntarily live in a methane atmosphere? Honestly. Get real air." He sighed. "Do excuse me, I must go deal with this. Darling," he said, kissing Double Trouble's hand. "My Queen," he said to Glimmer, repeating the gesture. His lips were cold. He swung himself off the cushion and strode off with the clone, talking at him angrily. 

"Thank you," Glimmer whispered to Double Trouble.

"Not at all!" they cried, sitting up and throwing their arms around her. "Oh Glimmer," they whispered in her ear. "I'm in terrible danger."

Glimmer winced. "Double Trouble, I - I know. When I asked you to -"

"In danger of falling in love!" They clutched their hands to their chest and fell back into the cushions, sighing dramatically. "Oh, who am I kidding, I'm so in love. Oh my GOD I'm so in love."

Glimmer blinked. "I - wow. Are you ... sure?"

"Am I SURE!? Glimmer he's a god. He's a literal god. You knew that when you put me in his bed!"

"I - I mean, I didn't specify -"

"You didn't need to, darling, I can read subtext."

"I'm sorry if -"

"Don't be SORRY, why are you SORRY? Glimmer!" They sat up. "You don't understand I - I have never - never in my LIFE - been this adored! And understood! He understands me. And I understand him. Understand?"

"I-"

"And oh my god the sex. The SEX, Glimmer." Double Trouble took both her hands in theirs. "Do you know how long I've been waiting for someone with enough imagination to really know what to DO with me? I mean he puts my shapeshifting to USE."

"Wow - you're really - sharing a lot right now."

"He's so creative. So brilliant. The things he comes up with. The things he lets me try! Nothing SCARES him! This one time - he wanted to - and then we -" They grinned toothily, shaking their fists with excitement. "Oooh I just - I can't even - just - !" They held a pillow over their face and screamed into it, then fell back on the cushion, kicking the air with glee.

Glimmer laughed incredulously. "Are you okay?"

"NO!" they shouted, tossing the pillow away snd sitting up. "It's like I'm living in a dream! Glimmer you don't understand - I never thought this would ever happen for me. I mean, me? THE Double Trouble? In love? Oh, but here I am. It's here and it's happening. I can't believe he's real. Beautiful, incredible, larger than life! He's amazing! And the best part is I think he feels the same way about me."

"He...seems to?"

"Do you think so? Do you really think so? Because I think so."

"I mean …." She frowned. "He did kinda hit on me pretty hard a minute ago. That doesn't bother you?"

They laughed. "BOTHER me? Why would that bother me? That's Prime being Prime. He's just my type - an unstoppable sexual beast. And besides," they said, lifting Glimmer's chin, "if I thought you were into it, well…let's just say you have very kissable lips, my Queen."

Glimmer's breath caught in her throat. Her face flushed hot.

Double Trouble's pupils widened. 

"Ohhhh. Tempted? Of course, why wouldn't you be?" they whispered, tilting their head. "Don't worry. We know how to be gentle with someone … inexperienced." 

They grinned, their tongue flicking up onto their eye.

"Oh! Um - I um - that's all you, Double Trouble. He's all yours. Thanks though."

They gave her a skeptical look then shrugged. "Suit yourself. But you're missing out."

"My dears!" they heard Prime call from across the garden. "Trubs! Queen Glimmer! Come quickly!" 

"Trubs?" she asked wryly.

"I know, could you die?" Double Trouble giggled and skipped off into the garden, leaving Glimmer behind. 

"I might," she muttered, following them.

"Ah, there you are!" Prime said as Glimmer caught up with them. Prime and Double Trouble stood before a deep grotto at a waterfall, thier hand on his chest, his arm around their waist. "Come look."

Prime pointed to something moving beneath water. A clone's face suddenly broke the surface, the gills on his neck opening and shutting. He smiled and gave a high pitched staccato squeal when he saw Prime.

"There he is! There's my good boy! Look, my Queen!" Prime cheered. "He learned!" 

***

"Looking good," Catra said. "Very shiny."

After he folded everything in the suite that could fold, Catra tasked Hordak with shining everything metallic. He was currently at work on the cutlery, wiping a spoon with a soft cloth. 

Suddenly the lights shut off.

"Here we go again," Catra muttered. But no alarm came, and no red backup lighting. Other than Hordak's green eyes, the suite was only illuminated by the stars and the refracted light off Etheria's brightest moon.

"Did we lose power?"

Perplexed, Hordak went to a wall and tapped it, revealing a control panel. An odd shifting, slumping sound came from behind it. Hordak took a step back.

"Something's in the wall," Catra whispered, rising from the couch.

"Spider." Hordak motioned for her to stay put and edged over to the vent. Gingerly bent to look inside it, opening his mouth for extra light. Something reflective clanged on the metal grate and there was a series of painfully bright flashing lights. Catra yelped and looked away, covering her eyes. When she turned she just barely discerned Hordak convulsing on the floor before the grate burst open and a dark, writhing mass came through it. 

"Oh!" came a voice. High pitched, nasal, chipper. "Hi Catra!"

"Wh - what -?" Catra began, but she could not finish, because a purple tentacle shot out across the room and wrapped itself around her throat, lifting her off the ground.


	12. A Big Soft Insect

"Funny thing about me," Entrapta said. "Something I just realized."

Having turned the lights back on, Entrapta casually strolled about the suite looking at the flowers, holding Catra near the ceiling by the neck. Entrapta's clothes were dirty and torn, her eyes sunken. She stepped over Hordak's convulsing body and looked up at her. "I don't get angry." 

Catra wriggled.

"I mean I get frustrated, sure. Experiments go wrong, beloved theories are disproven, it happens! But actually angry? Not often! And especially not at people! I mean I haven't had much opportunity - joining the Horde was the first time I'd been around people consistently enough to get angry at them. It's funny, like...the harder you try to be friends with someone, the more that person matters to you, so the easier it is for them to anger you. Not what I was expecting! But it explains why I'm so angry with you. I liked you, Catra. And I thought you liked me. I thought you were my FRIEND."

Catra sputtered and kicked. 

"There's another thing I haven't done," Entrapta said. "And that's kill someone."

Catra's eyes widened. She wriggled harder.

"On purpose, I mean." Entrapta tapped her chin thoughtfully as her hair tendril tightened around Catra's neck. "First time for everything. Wait, hold on!" A tendril reached into her pocket to retrieve her recorder and switched it on. "Horde Mothership, Day 4: I've located Catra. And now I'm going to break her neck."

Catra clawed desperately at Entrapta's hair. It may as well have been steel rebar.

"See, Scorpia and I had a chat. Several in fact. Catra was AWFUL to Scorpia. Scorpia was such a good friend to Catra, and Catra was a MONSTER to her. Which tracks because Catra is, in fact, a monster. She's monstrous not to just the people who love her, but literally everyone around her. Everyone extending to the WHOLE PLANET. Enough is enough! She's a fake, cruel person, and I personally think she's done enough damage to us and to Etheria. But let's see what Catra has to say. For science." The tendril loosened just enough for Catra to suck in a ragged breath of air. Entrapta held the recorder to her face. "Start talking."

"Hordak -" she choked, reaching out.

Entrapta's eyes narrowed. "What about Hordak?" 

Hordak, having lumbered to his feet behind the couch, lunged at Entrapta. She dodged and turned a device in his direction - an extremely bright hand held light - and there was another flurry of flashing. He grimaced, went stiff, and hit the ground. 

"That's Hordak? Oh, darn it!" Entrapta said. "I was really hoping I wouldn't have to do that to him but I knew I might." She took a deep breath. "It's temporary. He'll be fine." She turned to Catra. "And it's not a reason to let you live." 

"He - he loves me."

Entrapta's face fell. She suddenly whipped a bug-eyed mask down over her head. Her voice, though muffled, possessed a clear edge of anguish. "Whatever ... relationship ... you two may have developed while I was gone - it doesn't -" the hair tendril tightened around Catra's neck - "it doesn't-"

"What? No! Ew!" Catra sputtered. The tendril loosened. "Prime programmed him to love me and Glimmer like - like big - little - sisters!" she gasped. "He doesn't remember who you are. I'm his family. He'll defend me. He'll kill you."

"Actually he'll do no such thing! Where's the crystal, Catra?"

Catra's eyes widened. 

"I know you have it. I know it's in this room. Or maybe that one." A tendril of hair revealed a small tracker with a blinking green indicator. 

"Let me go and I'll show you."

"Ha! As if! It'll only take me a couple minutes to calibrate this tracker to do a super fine sweep." Entrapta flopped down on the couch, flipped her mask back up, and began fiddling with it. "Or you can just tell me. Your call."

"Why do you - want the crystal?" Catra asked. "All it did was power his armor."

"Oh, Catra," Entrapta sighed as though she were taking to the dumbest person she'd ever met. "Can you really call yourself someone's friend if you don't do a full back up of their brain every ten minutes?"

There was a movement behind the couch. Hordak swayed to his feet once more. He dizzily assessed the situation and dove for Entrapta like an angry old drunk. She turned, hit him with the flashing light, and down he went. Entrapta turned all the way around, catching him in her hair before he hit the ground.

"Eeesh," Entrapta said as she set him on the floor. "I mean I don't THINK it causes brain damage but I've never hit one this many times. What was that, three?" She drew her recorder down to her mouth and switched it on. "Horde Mothership, Day 4: I've hit Hordak's husk with the Light Show three times, which I think is a new record! Subject shows symptoms of-"

As Entrapta recorded she absently lowered Catra into striking range. Catra proceeded to make a mistake, and make it reflexively: she jabbed Entrapta hard in the back with her heel.

"OW!!" Entrapta yelped, her eyes flashing. She lifted Catra away, the hair tightening. "Now look here missy, that is IT! I'm gonna -"

Just then the door to the suite slid open to reveal an exhausted looking Glimmer. 

"Oh!" Entrapta chirped, waving. "Hi Glimmer!"

Glimmer surveyed the scene dispassionately for a moment before snapping to attention.

"En - Entrapta!?" she cried. "Entrapta what are you doing - put - put Catra down!"

"She kicked me!"

"You're strangling her!"

"So!?"

"So people don't like that!"

"If she tells me where the crystal is I'll let her go!"

"What crystal?" Glimmer asked.

"It's in a pillow!!" Catra choked. "I tore open a pillow - sewed it inside-"

Entrapta dropped Catra like a dead fish and ran into the bedroom. Something crashed. Fabric shredded.

"Glimmer," Catra croaked. "Tell her it's a couch pillow. "

***

"Okay, Hordak," Glimmer said, both hands on his chest. He let himself be restrained but made a big show of anger at Entrapta, growling and grunting and shaking his fists. "Hordak, I'm going to need you to calm down. It's ok. You don't understand."

"Oh I think he understands just fine," Catra grumbled, rubbing her bruised neck. She'd backed almost into a corner, as far from Entrapta as possible. Entrapta was entirely uninterested in both Catra and Hordak's threat display, frowning down at the crystal in her hands.

"Attendant, make us tea and little sandwiches!" Glimmer commanded.

Hordak did a double take at Glimmer, astonished.

"You heard me! March!"

Hordak twitched. Swallowed his rage. Bowed. He turned to walk towards the kitchen but stopped before Entrapta to point at her and growl. 

"Spider," he said accusingly. 

Entrapta did not look afraid. She just sighed.

He stepped back in surprise. 

"Hordak, the tea," Glimmer snapped. Hordak jumped and scurried into the kitchen, but not without casting a few backwards glances Entrapta's way. 

"Oh my god, I'm so tired," Glimmer said, sitting down hard on the couch and rubbing her eyes. "You will not believe what I had to just fucking witness."

"Prime horribly murdered Double Trouble?" Catra asked.

"No," Glimmer scoffed. "He's banging them through the center of the planet."

"Through the center of the planet? That makes sense if he wants to get to the Heart of Etheria." Entrapta frowned. "How though? With some kind of…." her eyes sparkled "singularity-powered planet-miner?"

"No, Entrapta," Glimmer said. "With his dick."

"Ew!" Catra cried. "Ew he made you watch!?" 

"Dude they tried to get me to join in!"

"EW!"

"Oh! Oh, you meant - oh," Entrapta said. "Who's this … Double Trouble person? The one getting the dick banging?"

"Please never say that again," Catra muttered.

Entrapta shot Catra a sharp look. Even being new to anger, she'd figured out how to focus it like a laser. Catra winced and looked away. 

"You think you're tired," Entrapta said, turning to Glimmer. "You didn't just spend four days scaling the vents of a ship the size of a small moon."

"How DID you get on the ship?" Glimmer asked.

"Oh that? That was easy. I saw some clones capturing animals to study and sending them up on transport drones. So I put on my bug mask and kinda - did some impromptu cosplay- " Entrapta wrapped her hair around herself in a complicated origami that resulted in her resembling a big soft insect. "They classified me as a spider and up I went." She elegantly unwrapped herself back onto the couch. "Prime doesn't put his A clones on zoo duty."

"How did you survive Beast Island?" Catra croaked from her corner.

"Oh wouldn't YOU like to know!" Entrapta crossed her arms and half-turned to Catra, her chin held high. "I was too busy hacking Beast Island for it to eat me."

"...eat you?"

"Yes, eat me!" Entrapta said. "That's what you signed me up for! Being eaten alive! Or did you not know that?"

Catra looked at the floor. "I … didn't. Actually."

"What did you think it was, a beach resort? You sent me to DIE."

"Entrapta I -"

Entrapta whipped a pillow off the couch and chucked it at Catra. It hit her directly in the face, stuck for a moment, then fell to the floor.

"That's fair," Catra said. 

Hordak emerged from the kitchen with a heavy tray. He growled at Entrapta as he approached the table and set the tray down. It was not one growl but a low constant one like an angry dog. He growled as he began to set the table, setting Entrapta's teapot before her with a loud clank. 

"Hordak, you're being rude," Glimmer said. "Entrapta's our guest."

He stopped growling and blinked. "Entrapta?"

"Yes, that's Entrapta. Do you remember her?" 

Hordak's eyes narrowed at Entrapta. He frowned at Glimmer and plucked something out of a flower arrangement - a soporific purple flower of the kind he'd presented to Catra earlier.

"Entrapta," he announced confidently, twirling the flower in his fingers. 

Then he pointed to Entrapta. 

"Spider," he growled.

"Hordak, rude," Glimmer scolded. "Go in the bedroom, plug your ears, and sing."

Hordak wilted. His ears lowered. He slowly turned and slumped towards the bedroom, his life over. When bedroom door slid open he gave an angry cry at the destruction he found there. 

"Spider!" he yelled, picking up shreds of pillow in his fists and shaking them, incensed. "Spider!"

"No yelling!" Glimmer yelled.

He threw the fabric scraps down and let the door close between them. They could hear him begin to aggressively shout - sing, muffled by the wall. 

Glimmer turned to Entrapta. "I'm sorry, he's just really protective."

"It's ok, that's not really Hordak. This is Hordak," Entrapta said, holding up the crystal. "His memories. His neural activity pathways. His central cortex. His everything."

Glimmer stared at it. "Hordak's in there?"

"Yep! Want to know how it works?" Entrapta chirped happily at Glimmer. "Here, I'll draw up a quick model." She reached for a pad of paper and pen set with an onyx lid that sat on the table, which neither Catra nor Glimmer had ever used. She flipped it open and stopped when she saw the pages. 

"Catra, did - did you draw these?" Entrapta asked.

"Draw what?"

Entrapta held up the notepad. On it was scrawled the symbol on the purple crystal, over and over again, page after page after page.

"No," Catra said.

"I didn't either," Glimmer said. "It must have been Hordak."

Entrapta stared down hard at the notepad, flipping pages. "Oh," she said quietly, her lower lip quivering. "That's ... odd."

"You ok?" Glimmer asked. 

"Look, since Hordak's in timeout, mind updating us how things are looking on the ground?" Catra asked. 

"I'll update GLIMMER," Entrapta said archly, wiping her eyes. "So GLIMMER, there's clone soldiers doing research planetside but no violence as of yet, at least not as of four days ago. They're pretty docile and peaceful, which was good for testing this," she said, holding up the light. "When I was building Hordak's armor I discovered a specific pattern and brightness that nonlethally and temporarily disrupts a clone's central cortex. I suspected it was some sort of failsafe security measure and I was right. I've seen little auxiliary diodes in almost every light panel I've gotten into on the ship. They trigger alarms when you mess with them. Prime's using them for SOMETHING."

"So he can just do that to all the clones on the ship at once if he needs to?" Catra asked.

"All of them, or even just clones in a specific room. And that might not be all they do. Prime's diodes are much more complicated than mine and likely have additional functions. I swiped a few to study." She reached into her pocket and produced a dark marble, which she held up to a light and examined with a jeweler's loup that suddenly appeared on her finger. "Beautiful work. LOTS going on in there. I suspect he can do anything from reprogram clones to terminate them with these."

There was a bright pink flash from the window, and Etheria vanished. In its place was another planet, grey with civilization, it's orbit heavy with traffic. 

"Did we just go somewhere? Did we just WARP?" Entrapta cried. She ran to the window and slapped both palms on it like a child. "Oh my god OH MY GOD it's another planet. And a busy planet! Wow, all kinds of - OOOOOH look at that SHIP!" she said as a particularly sleek shuttle of some kind zoomed past the window. 

Glimmer joined Entrapta at the window. "Entrapta, Adora said her sword broke, is that...true?"

"Hm? Oh! Yeah it did. Ooh!" She pointed at something flying by. "Oh, this place is fascinating."

"Entrapta, please -" Glimmer said, putting her hand on Entrapta's shoulder and turning her slightly. "What does that mean?"

"The word 'fascinating' means -"

"What does it mean that the sword broke?"

"Oh! As far as we can tell it makes Adora unable to turn into She-Ra or control the Heart of Etheria," she said, her gaze glued to the window like a cat at an aquarium. "So they're trying to break it."

"They're WHAT?"

"Thank you, I also think it's an extreme course of action, but they feel someone like Horde Prime could figure out how to hack it, and they don't want it falling into his hands. The problem is every time they attempt it the Princesses get sick. Like REALLY sick. Perfuma nearly died. OOOH!" Entrapta cried, clapping as the ship went to warp once more. The gray city planet was replaced by a desert planet with shifting rainbow sands and a dozens of small, multicolored crystalline moons. "Have you been feeling sick at all?" Entrapta asked.

"Other than with Prime, no." Glimmer said. "I can't connect with my runestone here."

"Not in orbit, no."

Catra wandered towards the window, looking out over Entrapta's shoulder. Entrapta's hair bumped out and shoved Catra back and to the floor.

"Hey!" Catra snapped.

"Don't sneak up on me," Entrapta said, her eyes narrowed.

"I was just looking out the window!"

"Sounds like what you'd JUST say before you JUST taze me." 

Catra rolled her eyes. "You're gonna have to get over it eventually."

"Those are very kind parameters Catra; 'not in my natural lifetime' falls under 'eventually.' Thank you for respecting my process."

Glimmer crossed her arms stepped between them.

"Hold a grudge if you want, Entrapta, but I'm gonna have to ask you not to strangle Catra again. I'm asking like full on, officially, as your queen and shit, do not murder Catra. I would not have survived here without her."

Entrapta crossed her arms and turned back towards the window. "I won't hurt her if she doesn't hurt me. But we are NOT cool, and we are NOT friends. Congratulations on ascending the throne, by the way. OOOH!" Entrapta cried, flapping her hands excitedly as the ship went to warp once more.

***

"I'll sleep in the vent, it's no problem," Entrapta said later.

"Are you sure?" Glimmer asked.

"It's safest, I think," Entrapta said, glancing at Hordak. After being released from exile he'd spent the evening glaring at Entrapta and growling wherever she stepped close. "Ooh, can I have a pillow and a blanket though? And some tiny sandwiches to go? That would be amazing."

"Hordak, make Entrapta some tiny sandwiches please," Glimmer said.

He gave Glimmer a withering look but did as she asked.

"He really has to do whatever you say?" Entrapta asked.

"Yeah," Glimmer said. "He really can have an attitude about it though."

Entrapta frowned. "Can you ask him not to spit in my sandwiches, or…?"

A few minutes and some spit-free tiny sandwiches later Entrapta yawned and crawled into the vent with her pillow and blanket.

"You're absolutely sure you want to sleep in there?" Glimmer asked again. "I'm sure we can figure something else out."

"Snug as a bug in a rug!" Entrapta cheered as she rolled in the blankets, making herself into a poofy burrito. She secured the grate back into place. "The pillow's the real star here, though. Oh this is great. So cozy. You should try it sometime."

"Okay," Glimmer said. "Goodnight then, I guess."

"Goodnight Glimmer! Bite me Catra! Sleep well! And don't!" 

"Well that's sweet," Catra muttered.

"Come on," Glimmer said, putting her hand on Catra's shoulder.

Hordak followed them into the bedroom and all was silent for about an hour. As soon as Glimmer and Catra fell asleep Hordak stormed out of the bedroom to throw himself down before the vent grate and growl at Entrapta. 

"Oh! Hi Hordak!" Entrapta said. "Can't sleep?"

"Spider," he hissed.

"Do all clones have this problem identifying arachnids? I'm not a spider, Hordak," she said, allowing a small lock of hair to slide through the grate and rest on his hand. "I'm your friend."

Hordak stopped growling at the contact, his eyes widening at the lock on his hand. He glanced at her then gingerly picked it up. She curled it loosely around his finger. He blinked at this, then peered through the vent at her in a way that was slightly less threatening and slightly more curious.

"You can look at me, it's okay," Entrapta said softly. Her eyes began to well up as he studied her. "Oh Hordak," she whispered. "I'm so sorry. This is all my fault. The conclusions I drew from my data on Catra were...wildly wrong. And the conclusions I drew from my data on you were -" her voice broke in a tiny sob - " were also wildly wrong."

He dipped head head forward, perplexed with her tears. She wiped her eyes.

"At first I was sure you'd come for me. But then the days passed - then - then months - and I thought oh. Of course. The portal was operational. You didn't need me anymore. Catra told you what she did, you shrugged your shoulders and moved forward. That's what you're known for, isn't it? Throwing people away? I felt stupid." She shut her eyes, tears streaming down her face. "I felt so, so stupid. But I still hung on! Because I couldn't figure it out! Because in my heart it didn't make sense! You'd never knowingly just leave me - I KNEW you'd never- and I was right! All Catra had to do was lie in the right way. You're terrible at discerning lies."

Hordak's face had gone slack as she spoke. He rested his chin on his wrist, entranced with the girl in the vent. 

"I'm sorry I doubted you. I'm sorry I trusted Catra. And I'm sorry you don't remember me. But you do remember this!" she cried, and pressed the crystal against the grate. 

Hordak peered at it then startled. He glanced back at forth between the crystal and his notepad on the coffee table in a panic, then narrowed his eyes at Entrapta. 

"Spider," he said warningly, pointing at her with a finger wrapped in purple hair.

"I saw your drawings. I know you remember. Is it because you know what it says? I left it like a puzzle for you, I knew one day you'd - and when you did - then you'd know." Entrapta's lip quivered. She took a shaky breath. "Did you figure it out? Hordak, did you ever figure it out what it says?"


End file.
